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TeenieAmerica's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 08/12/2011 at 6:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation
by James / 08/12/2011 at 3:54am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by TuteSweet / 08/12/2011 at 2:17am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 08/09/2011 at 5:21pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, my friend and I gave our numbers to some guys at a bar. Twenty minutes after we had left, we got a call. We excitedly answered the phone, only to hear the guy ask, "So are you the fat one or the ugly one?" FML
by me / 08/08/2011 at 11:43pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Wife / 08/07/2011 at 8:02pm / United States / Intimacy
by indierocklove / 08/03/2011 at 12:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML
by Nick / 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/18/2011 at 12:26am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by sbutler / 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, the whole family came together to celebrate my grandmother's 80th birthday. My grandfather read a poem he'd written about how he had taken my grandmother's virginity 60 years ago. It went on for about 30 minutes. FML
by Anonymous / 07/14/2011 at 4:40am / Austria / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 1:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Ella / 07/05/2011 at 7:48am / Australia (Queensland) / Love
Today, while on student exchange in Germany, I was making myself a cup of coffee. When I rummaged around in the fridge, my room-mates asked me what I was looking for. I said I wanted to put "samen" in my coffee. They laughed. Ah yes, "sahne" means "cream". "Samen" means "sperm". FML
by Hum / 07/02/2011 at 5:50pm / Switzerland (Ticino) / Intimacy
by Cowgirl_Up37 / 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…