FML: TeenieAmerica

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TeenieAmerica

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Town/Country : Asheville NC, USA
Title : Miss
Birth Date : Tuesday 14 July 1992 (19 years)
Number of visits : 3292
Number of comments : 216
Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 16 posted

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Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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TeenieAmerica's favorite FMLs

Today, I started at my new waitressing job. Our uniforms have the name of the restaurant on the left chest pocket. My first customer asked me what the other boob’s called. FML

#18443540 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (18994) - you deserved it (1883)

On 12/06/2011 at 7:26am - work - by boobywaitress (woman) - Australia

Today, in geometry class, we were working in dead silence. Apparently my phone wasn't on vibrate, and I received 25 texts all at once, while it blasted "Hakuna Matataaaa" out of my back pocket. They weren't even texts from friends, just Facebook notifications. FML

#18417096 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (7536) - you deserved it (20432)

On 12/03/2011 at 3:15am - misc - by Makala - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I had to bail both my parents out of jail. They'd thought it would be fun to go streaking. FML

#18323291 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (22220) - you deserved it (1673)

On 11/23/2011 at 1:02am - misc - by poorchild - United States (Colorado)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he farted. He blamed it on a "nearby frog." FML

#18320267 (147)

I agree, your life sucks (21865) - you deserved it (3696)

On 11/22/2011 at 8:00pm - intimacy - by Gabriela -

Today, I went to my doctor. I casually asked him why I keep getting headaches after I masturbate. He said it probably was a sign from God. FML

I agree, your life sucks (11243) - you deserved it (3056)

On 11/22/2011 at 4:36am - intimacy - by toomuch (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I kindly asked my crazy roommate to move out. She answered by stuffing raw hamburger meat down all the drains in the apartment. FML

#18260182 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (8417) - you deserved it (822)

On 11/15/2011 at 11:15pm - misc - by ledon (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063 (199)

I agree, your life sucks (10489) - you deserved it (6019)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy - United States

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

#18254436 (231)

I agree, your life sucks (9229) - you deserved it (40752)

On 11/15/2011 at 10:16am - kids - by Margo (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, as a support worker, I spent 45 minutes making various attempts to calm a violent autistic kid. Just as soon as I was sure the crisis was over, he beat me as hard as he could with the "Things I Can Do When I'm Mad" book I'd given him. FML

#18244836 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (17291) - you deserved it (2196)

On 11/14/2011 at 8:37am - work - by metallifreak44 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found an old jock strap in my tuba. FML

#18244771 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (7354) - you deserved it (1133)

On 11/14/2011 at 8:23am - misc - by jocksblow - United States

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

#18242988 (152)

I agree, your life sucks (11029) - you deserved it (1298)

On 11/14/2011 at 12:23am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618 (189)

I agree, your life sucks (25892) - you deserved it (4724)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my buddy told me he was going to get an HIV test at the health department. Without thinking, I told him to "think positive". FML

#18216431 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (21367) - you deserved it (5264)

On 11/11/2011 at 3:42am - health - by devinchi (man) - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML

#18003683 (142)

I agree, your life sucks (26406) - you deserved it (1598)

On 10/17/2011 at 12:20am - health - by blarp - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

#17985302 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (10019) - you deserved it (1539) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by adieuvelib - France

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