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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10044) - you deserved it (22488)
On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my girlfriend thinks my house is filled with ghosts. She can only hear them when I fart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17971) - you deserved it (3901)
On 11/03/2011 at 7:48am - misc - by Tyler Smith - United States
Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22851) - you deserved it (2206)
On 10/25/2011 at 1:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29955) - you deserved it (3669)
On 10/16/2011 at 3:15am - work - by Unemployed - United States (Oregon)
Today, I got pulled over for distracted driving. Not for cell phone use but for nose picking and inspecting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8091) - you deserved it (30556)
On 09/17/2011 at 4:37am - misc - by jj4320 - United States (California)
Today, I was brutally run over by a man in a wheelchair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18449) - you deserved it (2555)
On 09/16/2011 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23052) - you deserved it (8566)
On 09/12/2011 at 9:52am - animals - by squeak (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23052) - you deserved it (8566)
On 09/12/2011 at 9:52am - animals - by squeak (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21162) - you deserved it (2484)
On 09/02/2011 at 2:54am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15854) - you deserved it (7322)
On 08/16/2011 at 12:55pm - work - by secret dancer (woman) - Sweden (Jonkopings Lan)
Today, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets. I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help. They hover and wait for you to surface. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30673) - you deserved it (2311)
On 07/25/2011 at 12:14am - health - by sisi9999 (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was riding on the bus, when I felt a weird sensation on my hair. The person behind me was petting it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24436) - you deserved it (1968)
On 07/19/2011 at 9:29pm - misc - by imnotacat (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46844) - you deserved it (7161)
On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)
Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46844) - you deserved it (7161)
On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)
Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8408) - you deserved it (38251)
On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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