TdotMaria

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Offline (the 11/29/2014 at 11:42am)

TdotMaria

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 October 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3957
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About TdotMaria : So I've been around FML for a while just lurking in the shadows chuckling at others misfortune but don't get me wrong I've had a few FMLs myself... I've been bit by a squirrel and taken to A&E - but I'm not ready to talk about that yet and still have the craving for nuts.

On a side note I'm 22, from London and not a bad person so I wouldn't mind a message every now and then.

TdotMaria's page activity

Visits<b>Damned_Architect</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 3:44am<b>TheisM</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 7:27am<b>BrettB321</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 12:02am<b>rareawesomeness</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 2:29am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 11:11pm<b>Andrewski12</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 7:50pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 1:27pm<b>LEDZEPPALLTHEWAY</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 8:12pm<b>mrjiggles1992</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 10:28pm<b>je83185</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 9:40pm<b>DarkSaul</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:29am<b>JKROB</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 9:38am<b>Nate66</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 12:27am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 6:37pm<b>vikky538</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 9:52pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 5:27am<b>MJD14</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 4:55am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 5:45am

Fucked!<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 7:27pm<b>monsterman11</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:13pm<b>Chewbacon</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 10:57pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 5:02pm<b>DerrickJames</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:49pm

TdotMaria's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of TdotMaria's badges

TdotMaria's favorite FMLs

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2013 at 6:46pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Intimacy

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

by Blood on my hands / 08/07/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Animals

Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML

by Anonymous / 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm / United States / Holidays

Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML

by spellbound / 12/19/2012 at 9:59am / Australia (Western Australia) / Kids

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm / Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan) / Animals

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

by whitecollar / 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm / United Kingdom (York) / Work

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen for my mom to come home, I thought it would be funny to talk to her in the nude. Turns out she's only blind in one eye. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2012 at 8:29pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to play Twister. Her parents watched us the whole time, making sure we didn't touch. FML

by tehaustiebear / 10/03/2012 at 6:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2012 at 1:01am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to clean my face of unwanted visitors, and spent my shower popping the pimples on my cheeks. Twenty minutes later, I remembered that I was showering ahead of a date with my girlfriend. My cheeks now look like the crater-filled surface of Mars. FML

by greeple / 09/10/2012 at 12:19pm / Singapore / Health

Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2012 at 1:15am / United States / Health

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

by diggingaplotforone / 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the mall, when a guy started screaming at his buddy for sleeping with his sister. It was pretty hilarious, so when he stormed off, I mockingly yelled, "Pussy!" He then whirled around and beat the absolute hell out of his friend. Now I feel like I'm going to reincarnate as a turd. FML

by feelsterrible / 08/09/2012 at 3:51pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

by Anonymous / 07/25/2012 at 6:54am / United States (California) / Kids