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Today, I had to run a timed mile. I'm terrible at running. During the run, I thought I was doing a good job. That is, until the teacher told me to stop because I was three laps behind everyone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19467) - you deserved it (4113)
On 01/11/2012 at 7:51am - health - by Fluffy - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend changed his relationship status on Facebook to "Single" and his status to "I'm not kidding, leave your key on the counter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30568) - you deserved it (2593)
On 01/10/2012 at 12:52am - love - by Janie (woman) - United States
Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40175) - you deserved it (2607)
On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend insisted that the dog stay in our bedroom while we had sex. He said it would prove his dominance, and "show the dog who's boss." My boyfriend needs to prove his self-worth to an animal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26483) - you deserved it (3334)
On 12/10/2011 at 2:23am - intimacy - by HBC - United States (Texas)
Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied, "Why do you think I've been so often on top lately?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25043) - you deserved it (6018)
On 12/09/2011 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend left me for my neighbor. Her name is Hope. She'd better "hope" I don't take a dump in her yard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20093) - you deserved it (12883)
On 12/09/2011 at 9:48pm - misc - by queenlatifa101bebe (woman) - United States
Today, I noticed we had gotten new colored toothpicks at the restaurant I work at. That was the highlight of my day. Apparently my life has gotten so boring I get excited over colored toothpicks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15531) - you deserved it (2957)
On 12/08/2011 at 2:30am - work - by dulllife - United States (Texas)
Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24166) - you deserved it (3278)
On 12/07/2011 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by journey_Jeanne - United States (California)
Today, I went to a concert. Being 6'5" was a great advantage because I could see the stage from wherever I was stood. On the downside, I was used by people as a meeting point. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22102) - you deserved it (2613)
On 12/06/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by jackgrant (man) - Iran Islamic Republic of
Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9217) - you deserved it (31801)
On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -
Today, my boyfriend admitted the reason he was dating me was because he has a fetish for grandmothers and apparently I look, smell, and act like one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25497) - you deserved it (3291)
On 12/06/2011 at 12:13pm - love - by grannygirlfriend - United States
Today, a 65 year old toothless gas station attendant asked me out on a date in exchange for free gas, and I said yes. This is what my unemployment has come to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24789) - you deserved it (5676)
On 12/06/2011 at 2:03am - money - by BrokeandDesperate (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10940) - you deserved it (27567)
On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20159) - you deserved it (4440)
On 12/05/2011 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)
Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28248) - you deserved it (4226)
On 12/04/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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