![[fr]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
This member hasn't filled in the description.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28181) - you deserved it (1707)
On 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by incestastic - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40157) - you deserved it (6021)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, when my boyfriend and I were becoming intimate, his cat decides to jump onto the bed and lie right in between us. He then informs me that he wanted to stop to "preserve his cat's innocence." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19192) - you deserved it (3150)
On 12/19/2009 at 5:18am - love - by Madagascar (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I have been getting calls from a weird kid from my school asking for nudes. I asked how he got my number, then found out that my friends put my number on a pole at school saying "Call Wendy for a good time, she has nice tits". FML
I agree, your life sucks (21306) - you deserved it (2146)
On 12/12/2009 at 6:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I left work to find a note on my windshield that read, "I think you're cute," with a phone number written down as well. I got super excited and immediately dialed. The phone was answered by a woman laughing hysterically. It was my Mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26935) - you deserved it (4499)
On 12/12/2009 at 12:23am - love - by MarkTheShark (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (10702) - you deserved it (14449)
On 12/11/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18463) - you deserved it (3239)
On 12/10/2009 at 6:47am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)
Today, during a review session for a botany class, I began to space out. Then, I started to go, "beep, beep, beep, beep." I stopped when I noticed the entire class staring at me as if I were insane. This was not the first time this had happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5588) - you deserved it (21683)
On 12/10/2009 at 4:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was attending a drug-free lecture at school. The speaker said, "There are many ways to quit smoking. You can try patches, gum, or even quitting cold turkey. Any questions?" I raised my hand, and she called on me. I asked, "How does cold turkey help?" And then I realized. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4794) - you deserved it (22658)
On 12/09/2009 at 7:53pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I recieved a 4 page letter in the post from a woman telling me she was Alan's wife. She spoke about their wedding in 2004, their two beautiful kids who love their daddy very much (she included pictures), and how much she loves him. Alan is my husband of 7 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36029) - you deserved it (1659)
On 12/09/2009 at 6:47pm - love - by _RobotInDisguise (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, I mailed out all my Christmas cards. As I was relaxing and being impressed with myself for being so organized this year, I saw the stack of Christmas cards on the coffee table. Everyone will be receiving an empty envelope for Christmas this year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6168) - you deserved it (23022)
On 12/09/2009 at 1:58pm - misc - by ChristmasCardDork (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I was doing homework in my room when my roommate started meowing all of a sudden. Not only was he meowing, he started to make loud cat noises that resembled a cat being run over by a car. He's gonna be my roommate for the rest of the year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20287) - you deserved it (2087)
On 12/07/2009 at 3:54am - animals - by SeeMeInTheDark (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I lit some candles while waiting for my girlfriend to come over. I was trying to be romantic. Suddenly, I hear screaming from my bedroom. I run in thinking it was my girlfriend. Turns out my cat lit his whiskers on fire by sniffing the candles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20924) - you deserved it (3930)
On 12/06/2009 at 11:30am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23143) - you deserved it (5229)
On 12/04/2009 at 8:16pm - misc - by olive_costume (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was run over by a car. My car. My 8 year old son put the car in neutral in the driveway while I was behind it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18894) - you deserved it (5193)
On 12/04/2009 at 8:08pm - health - by qwertogo (man) - United States (Texas)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
