Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Szaszaspasz

Offline (7 hours ago) | Search for a member

Szaszaspasz

30Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 April 1971 (44 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3789
  • Number of comments : 251
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Szaszaspasz : Domestically Challenged - My cookbook has Yellow Pages.

Favourite designers: Makita, DeWalt, Craftsman, JobMate and Black & Decker

There is nothing wrong with getting old. It is when you stop getting older that really sucks.

Szaszaspasz's page activity

Visits<b>Immortal_Toaster</b> - 45 minutes ago<b>Scrambled</b> - 59 minutes ago<b>missblue97</b> - 5 hours ago<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - 7 hours ago<b>Ravy</b> - 8 hours ago<b>Pablo1321</b> - 9 hours ago<b>Katluv4566</b> - 10 hours ago<b>gigglegigglesnor</b> - 13 hours ago<b>C7</b> - 14 hours ago<b>SurfingPichu</b> - 16 hours ago<b>meli1195</b> - 19 hours ago<b>rozalyn77</b> - 20 hours ago<b>Nacho522</b> - 20 hours ago<b>RiverD23</b> - 21 hours ago<b>AutisticAbyss</b> - 23 hours ago<b>dwarrior1877</b> - yesterday at 5:07am<b>FitFriday</b> - yesterday at 1:29am<b>InsomniacDream</b> - yesterday at 1:27am

Fucked!<b>arabian22</b> - yesterday at 8:12pm<b>corporatescoundr</b> - yesterday at 4:52pm<b>BellaBear90</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 7:47am<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 6:08am<b>KyleWilson</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 9:59pm<b>erica_mae13</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 5:02pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 3:22pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 10:24am<b>insanecutie</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 6:11am<b>badassmf1234</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 4:30am<b>CCRider</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 12:23am<b>manoverbored</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 10:42pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 9:22pm<b>JCX2</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 8:02pm<b>Walmartian2015</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 7:10pm<b>jsan727</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 3:17pm<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 2:26pm<b>jolaurr</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 2:14pm

Szaszaspasz's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Szaszaspasz's badges

Szaszaspasz's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML

#20026361
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24371) - you deserved it (2458)

On 08/17/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I was walking up some stairs and heard a noise as if someone was following me. The faster I went, the louder the noise got. I was too scared to realize that it was just my thighs causing my jeans to chafe. FML

#20016166
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17332) - you deserved it (9889)

On 08/12/2012 at 12:34am - misc - by FlorenceD - United States (Texas)

Today, my new boss, the CEO's son, finally showed up for work, three days late and right after lunch break. His first order of business was to call a meeting and scream at everyone for not having a diet latte waiting for him on his desk. God help us all. FML

#20013987
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27697) - you deserved it (1543)

On 08/10/2012 at 7:16pm - work - by SHIIIIITTTT (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML

#20009332
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31278) - you deserved it (3355)

On 08/08/2012 at 9:53am - work - by blakeintheoffice - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he was a vampire. I burst out in laughter and said he was ridiculous. He looked at me in disgust and said he couldn't be with someone who didn't trust and believe in him. I'm now single. FML

#20005230
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28745) - you deserved it (5504)

On 08/06/2012 at 2:37am - love - by shastadoe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that when you hear a bump in the night, it's best not to check your parents' room. Some things cannot be unseen. FML

#20001682
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16301) - you deserved it (20882)

On 08/04/2012 at 2:56am - misc - by alyssabree42 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I took my first fare as a qualified taxi-driver. The pride soon diminished as I was forced to listen to my passenger give a greatly detailed description of his recent colonoscopy. FML

#20000200
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19287) - you deserved it (2234)

On 08/03/2012 at 10:52am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML

#19999762
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31781) - you deserved it (2787)

On 08/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by SingleAgain (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, one of the human turds that I stupidly added on Facebook posted how terrible her life is after her dad refused to arrange yet another holiday for her this year, so I bitched her out for being such a spoiled little brat. A few hours later, her boyfriend came over and beat the shit out of me. FML

#19996782
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29434) - you deserved it (32525)

On 08/01/2012 at 4:59pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, my boyfriend of seven months and I were looking at some pictures on his iPad. I saw a picture of a kid of about two years old that looked a little like him. I jokingly said, "What, is that your son?" Imagine my surprise when he said that it was. FML

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for dinner. The first words out of my dad's mouth were apparently, "Ah, you must be Dan's slam-piece." I was in the living room and didn't quite catch it all, but I said, "She certainly is!" Now I'm single, and all my friends think I'm a bastard. FML

#19824273
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21882) - you deserved it (9900)

On 06/21/2012 at 2:19pm - love - by igiveup (man) - United States

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11605) - you deserved it (42888)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, after months of using the empty driveway across the street from my house, a note was placed under my windshield wiper. It read, "Please stop parking in my driveway. P.S. You’re hot. Are you single?" FML

#19659146
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7849) - you deserved it (36107)

On 05/21/2012 at 9:05pm - misc - by bronco_lover89 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while volunteering at a local homeless shelter, I asked the woman next to me how long she'd been homeless. She works there. FML

#19655540
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21444) - you deserved it (9969)

On 05/21/2012 at 1:28am - work - by HomelessGirl1 - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mother described what her ideal daughter-in-law should be like. Half-way through her description, fishing for some compliments, I told her that such a girl would be way above my league. She sighed and emphatically agreed. FML

#19643133
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20875) - you deserved it (9068)

On 05/18/2012 at 6:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: