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SuperAnthony's favorite FMLs
by rofld / 07/14/2010 at 12:47pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML
by sarah / 07/14/2010 at 12:32am / United States / Health
by No.Life. / 07/14/2010 at 12:09am / United States (Vermont) / Geek
by Sally / 07/13/2010 at 5:22am / United States (California) / Health
Today, to save money, I wanted to fix my own leaky roof instead of hiring someone. When I got on the roof, the ladder fell. As it was falling, it broke three windows and snagged the siding of my house ripping over half of it off. FML
by Anonymous / 07/11/2010 at 1:15am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by thesadone / 07/03/2010 at 2:49am / United States (California) / Geek
Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML
by bleredoshia / 04/08/2010 at 12:27am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Kids
Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML
by Anonymous / 03/17/2010 at 3:32pm / United States (Michigan) / Work
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
by Satan / 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by Anonymous / 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
by chanclepants / 01/27/2010 at 8:35am / Intimacy
Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML
by Ben / 01/24/2010 at 10:31pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by squirrel / 01/09/2010 at 12:01am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by snickerdoodles / 01/08/2010 at 1:30am / Miscellaneous
Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML
by Anonymous / 12/20/2009 at 3:47am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…