About Suikerlolly : C: i enjoy laughing at other people's misery...don't we all?
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (460057) - you deserved it (571637)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I received a card in the mail. It was from my vet's office. Written inside was "We send our sympathy during this trying time." I haven't been home in three days. I can't find my dog and my mother won't talk about it. My dog was 7. She hated that dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56224) - you deserved it (1595)
On 03/05/2009 at 11:06am - animals - by nochance (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53151) - you deserved it (584594)
On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
I agree, your life sucks (987344) - you deserved it (78533)
On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Today, during a game of manhunt, my brother and his friends thought it would be funny to tie me to a telelphone pole with my very own multicolored jumprope from when I was younger. They left me there. My mom drove by, stared and then laughed, She kept driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49278) - you deserved it (3856)
On 02/27/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (55497) - you deserved it (323241)
On 02/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by Noname - United States (Michigan)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (203737) - you deserved it (40297)
On 02/21/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by GD (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML
I agree, your life sucks (649549) - you deserved it (11913)
On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was watching TV when the Jim Beam commercial came on with the hot girl saying how she likes her men fat and hairy. My mom walked in and said, "See honey, you still have a chance." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30678) - you deserved it (3465)
On 02/16/2009 at 4:45pm - misc - by LonelyInLA (man) - United States (California)
Today, I texted my boyfriend saying "Hi." His response: "I got your best friend pregnant". FML
I agree, your life sucks (482713) - you deserved it (43306)
On 02/07/2009 at 10:08pm - misc - by bittersweet - United States (New York)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (525768) - you deserved it (37850)
On 02/06/2009 at 10:29am - intimacy - by caroline (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39715) - you deserved it (11212)
On 02/05/2009 at 8:23am - animals - by #201 (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15923) - you deserved it (26169)
On 02/04/2009 at 6:23am - animals - by Noname - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I spent $400 at the stripclub and got 4 phone numbers. I as walked out of the club, I noticed it was tranny-night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6784) - you deserved it (33725)
On 02/02/2009 at 11:42pm - money - by bluntedone (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I ate at a friend's house. Her 5-year-old son, who was at the table with us, looked at me and said quietly, "You're ugly." My friend told him off, causing him to cry, and shout, "But she isn't pretty!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43800) - you deserved it (3375)
On 11/13/2008 at 11:16pm - kids - by mimo - Sent from mobile version
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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