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Squander

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Squander
  • Town/Country : Squanderland, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 September 1994 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1175
  • Number of comments : 159
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Squander : AND NOW MY PICTURE IS ACTUALLY ME!
Except the Sunny is still there, because I love the sunny :)

FAVORITE THINGS:
Smiley faces, heavy metal music, candy, colouring, people, worms, wiggly worms, sex, mermaids, drawing pictures, singing, disney movies, cooking, red lipstick, dresses, birthdays, foreign languages, astronomy, fish, makeup, wikipedia, learning & pondering.

-More stuff about me-
I memorize dates like a real machine.
I liken my love life to a Disney movie by day, a porno by night.
I love wiggly worms. Get 'em at Dollarama. They're adorable.
I'm the weirdest thing, but people can't help but be drawn to me.
I love most things.

Squander's last visitors

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Squander's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so starved of human contact that I almost took up a transsexual hooker's offer of a "good time." Nothing wrong with that really, but they looked like a haunted tree dressed as Liza Minnelli. FML

#17675561
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8464) - you deserved it (16683)

On 09/05/2011 at 10:38pm - intimacy - by Username (man) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered why my house smells like death. Apparently, because of the rain, a whole load of worms crawled into my garage and died. They're everywhere. FML

#14291054
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22075) - you deserved it (1985)

On 12/21/2010 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML

#13997572
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10548) - you deserved it (23744)

On 11/27/2010 at 7:36am - misc - by Flaps - United States (New York)

Today, when I signed into Amazon, their top recommendation for me based on past purchases was "The Brave Little Toaster" on DVD. FML

#13761908
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6444) - you deserved it (18472)

On 11/08/2010 at 4:04am - misc - by lambxox - United States

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31485) - you deserved it (3045)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I applied for a job and sent my CV, then realised I sent the example CV I got off the internet. Now they think Bob Brown who lives at 123 Sunshine Street is applying for a job. FML

#12261661
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6956) - you deserved it (29080)

On 08/02/2010 at 5:50am - work - by Julia (woman) - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, my family and I went to the coast. Our dog was off the leash because we were the only people around. He was delighted to find a dead seal carcass and roll around in its remains. We then had a 3 hour drive home. FML

#11822589
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20142) - you deserved it (5945)

On 07/12/2010 at 1:38am - animals - by LexiBoBexi (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my roommate will fall asleep to Muppet Treasure Island. We sleep 3 feet away from each other and he has been doing this since Christmas. FML

#8400903
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14893) - you deserved it (1748)

On 02/18/2010 at 4:48am - misc - by Oze (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

#7261053
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27190) - you deserved it (1960)

On 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by daragnan (man) - United States

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

#7261053
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27190) - you deserved it (1960)

On 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by daragnan (man) - United States

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML

Today, my best friend was texting me about her sick dog. She wrote "Do you think she will get better?", so I wrote "I hope she does". It wasn't until later that I realized I accidentally wrote "I hope she dies" instead. FML

#7154032
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24107) - you deserved it (6551)

On 01/04/2010 at 10:32pm - animals - by poordog (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I finally got around to writing my Christmas cards. After finishing, I realized I had written "Happy Birthday" instead of "Merry Christmas" on every single one. FML

#6850443
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7849) - you deserved it (25138)

On 12/20/2009 at 5:41pm - misc - by mannnnn2717 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my grandson asked how old I am and whether I'd seen Mammoths "for real" when I was a kid. FML

#6507610
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23955) - you deserved it (3601)

On 11/29/2009 at 2:13am - kids - by Granmacathy (woman) - United States (New York)



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Monday 17 June 2013

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