Squander

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Squander

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 September 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1910
  • Number of comments : 159
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Squander : AND NOW MY PICTURE IS ACTUALLY ME!
Except the Sunny is still there, because I love the sunny :)

FAVORITE THINGS:
Smiley faces, heavy metal music, candy, colouring, people, worms, wiggly worms, sex, mermaids, drawing pictures, singing, disney movies, cooking, red lipstick, dresses, birthdays, foreign languages, astronomy, fish, makeup, wikipedia, learning & pondering.

-More stuff about me-
I memorize dates like a real machine.
I liken my love life to a Disney movie by day, a porno by night.
I love wiggly worms. Get 'em at Dollarama. They're adorable.
I'm the weirdest thing, but people can't help but be drawn to me.
I love most things.

Squander's page activity

Visits<b>alwayscomplain</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 5:51pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 4:08pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 10:59am<b>RitaRenne</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 4:14am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 9:09pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 7:40pm<b>masschris</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 3:29pm<b>PopBlox</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 11:26pm<b>plebs_everywhere</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 12:32pm<b>oldskoolfun</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 6:57pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 2:04pm<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 5:31am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 7:39pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 1:59pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 6:32pm<b>ForGodAndMusic</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 1:19pm<b>MistyKittyx</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 2:26am<b>Zyssii</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:30am

Fucked!<b>delfino1604</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 4:59pm<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 3:09am<b>masschris</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 9:29pm<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 11:32am<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 12:13pm

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Squander's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so starved of human contact that I almost took up a transsexual hooker's offer of a "good time." Nothing wrong with that really, but they looked like a haunted tree dressed as Liza Minnelli. FML

by Username / 09/05/2011 at 10:38pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered why my house smells like death. Apparently, because of the rain, a whole load of worms crawled into my garage and died. They're everywhere. FML

by Anonymous / 12/21/2010 at 10:25pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML

by Flaps / 11/27/2010 at 7:36am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, when I signed into Amazon, their top recommendation for me based on past purchases was "The Brave Little Toaster" on DVD. FML

by lambxox / 11/08/2010 at 4:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

by cantstoplaughing / 10/06/2010 at 12:32am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I applied for a job and sent my CV, then realised I sent the example CV I got off the internet. Now they think Bob Brown who lives at 123 Sunshine Street is applying for a job. FML

by Julia / 08/02/2010 at 5:50am / New Zealand (Otago) / Work

Today, my family and I went to the coast. Our dog was off the leash because we were the only people around. He was delighted to find a dead seal carcass and roll around in its remains. We then had a 3 hour drive home. FML

by LexiBoBexi / 07/12/2010 at 1:38am / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

by human torch / 03/18/2010 at 11:22am / United States / Health

Today, my roommate will fall asleep to Muppet Treasure Island. We sleep 3 feet away from each other and he has been doing this since Christmas. FML

by Oze / 02/18/2010 at 4:48am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

by daragnan / 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

by daragnan / 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML

by StinkyCactus / 01/08/2010 at 1:23am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my best friend was texting me about her sick dog. She wrote "Do you think she will get better?", so I wrote "I hope she does". It wasn't until later that I realized I accidentally wrote "I hope she dies" instead. FML

by poordog / 01/04/2010 at 10:32pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I finally got around to writing my Christmas cards. After finishing, I realized I had written "Happy Birthday" instead of "Merry Christmas" on every single one. FML

by mannnnn2717 / 12/20/2009 at 5:41pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandson asked how old I am and whether I'd seen Mammoths "for real" when I was a kid. FML

by Granmacathy / 11/29/2009 at 2:13am / United States (New York) / Kids