Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SpringDiver

Search for a member

SpringDiver

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1177
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

SpringDiver's page activity

Visits<b>destanilovesyou</b> - the 05/08/2013 at 1:12pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/30/2012 at 9:36am<b>asamir</b> - the 09/23/2012 at 7:55am<b>manaia18</b> - the 09/22/2012 at 2:31pm

SpringDiver's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of SpringDiver's badges

SpringDiver's favorite FMLs

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32896) - you deserved it (3122)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

#18188542
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30537) - you deserved it (2521)

On 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm - work - by lprocter1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

#18095977
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26460) - you deserved it (4899)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at my job in the cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like you. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML

#17999888
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30050) - you deserved it (5809) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/16/2011 at 5:08pm - work - by Mayabie - France

Today, I went to Walmart to pick up some groceries. When I came out, the front end of my car was crushed in. On the window was a note only saying "Sorry I bumped into your car." FML

#17839244
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27970) - you deserved it (2151)

On 09/26/2011 at 1:18pm - money - by This Guy - United States

Today, my 4 year old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML

#17528012
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30128) - you deserved it (7923)

On 08/20/2011 at 10:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while being robbed, a man heroically chased down the robber and got my purse back. He then looked at the distance between us, turned the other way and ran off with it. FML

#15974140
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44265) - you deserved it (3332)

On 04/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went up to a girl at a bus stop and started chatting her up. Her response? "Am I being robbed?" FML

#15631458
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29258) - you deserved it (6528)

On 04/04/2011 at 2:15am - misc - by Anonymous - Mozambique (Maputo)

Today, I found out that my dog is so lazy, she doesn't even get out of my bed in the morning to poop. FML

#15591569
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31469) - you deserved it (6349)

On 04/01/2011 at 5:12pm - animals - by poopybed - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to my son's high school play. The moment I arrived at the auditorium, I shouted out his name to let him know I made it. Thinking I was a student, a teacher yelled, "SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN!" Scared out of my mind, I quickly obeyed, to mass giggling from the kids. FML

#15098216
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13191) - you deserved it (31244)

On 02/24/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by Annie (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML

#14952962
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32680) - you deserved it (3184)

On 02/12/2011 at 9:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after 2 years together, my boyfriend finally proposed. I excitedly said yes. Just as we began to kiss, my half crazed cat ran in, dropped a half eaten bird at our feet, and promptly threw up on the carpet. FML

#14779730
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26411) - you deserved it (4689)

On 01/30/2011 at 9:34pm - animals - by birdguts (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, a friend and I saw some deer outside my car. Since we were both leaving for college the next day we wanted to do something memorable so we decided to chase the deer. Turns out the deer wanted to chase us too. We ran for over five minutes screaming. FML

#14670842
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7118) - you deserved it (47776)

On 01/22/2011 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

#14376347
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14900) - you deserved it (48500)

On 12/29/2010 at 12:20am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I planned to drop a water balloon on my visiting prankster brother from my new apartment's balcony. As he crossed the street, I launched the balloon, and sent it right behind him. It hit an eight year old on a scooter. FML

#14126136
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7509) - you deserved it (31193)

On 12/07/2010 at 11:20pm - misc - by bullseyed (woman) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: