Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Spiral_Thoughts

Offline (the 12/11/2014 at 7:47am) | Search for a member

Spiral_Thoughts

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 558
  • Number of comments : 95
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Spiral_Thoughts's page activity

Visits<b>Enslaved</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:13am<b>depressed_child</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:34pm<b>a_wiener_d0g</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 4:01pm<b>shudson186</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 7:50am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:03pm<b>Space_Teddy</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 6:10pm<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 5:33pm<b>Ethan_Blevins</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:19am<b>mollychurch14</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 1:28am<b>Horsempeg</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 8:19pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:30pm<b>Cherryta</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:37pm<b>thatchick1405</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 9:03pm<b>NotDarkKnight</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:34am<b>briang959</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 7:32am<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 4:02am<b>Adam5858</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 9:47pm<b>DawnofDark</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 6:46pm

Spiral_Thoughts's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Spiral_Thoughts's badges

Spiral_Thoughts's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents accused me of being secretive. I have no idea what they're talking about; all I do is work, go to school, sleep, and eat. Now I'm grounded until I tell them what's going on. I have crazy parents, that's what's going on. FML

#21242846
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42383) - you deserved it (2719)

On 08/22/2014 at 12:09am - misc - by up to no-good... - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I tasted a perfectly salted, crispy, and dead carpenter ant hidden in my bag of pistachios. FML

#21242612
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32677) - you deserved it (3010)

On 08/21/2014 at 5:48pm - misc - by ReluctantAntEater (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

#21241441
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43258) - you deserved it (5490)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Mia (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42912) - you deserved it (9387) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, at the beach, I noticed a plastic bag in the water. I wanted to do something good for a change, help protect the environment and get it out. It wasn't a bag; it was a jellyfish. FML

#21236316
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39286) - you deserved it (8404) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/13/2014 at 12:28am - animals - by Muwz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40933) - you deserved it (25777)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51602) - you deserved it (21090)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found a piece of erotic fiction on my brother's computer. It involved two lesbian teenagers, who just so happened to have the same names and physical descriptions as my sister and me. FML

#21233221
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43508) - you deserved it (4093)

On 08/09/2014 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, as I wandered through the streets of an unfamiliar city, I spotted a cop and darted across the street to ask for assistance. He kindly gave me directions as he wrote me out a citation for jaywalking. FML

#21230350
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36534) - you deserved it (8846)

On 08/05/2014 at 7:46pm - misc - by spekledworf (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

#21225778
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38765) - you deserved it (6716)

On 07/31/2014 at 12:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got expelled from school. I was walking down a flight of stairs when I tripped and bumped into a kid ahead of me by mistake. He fell forward and took half a dozen people down with him. The staff think I did it on purpose, and there's talk of charges being pressed. FML

#21220439
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45803) - you deserved it (3727)

On 07/25/2014 at 4:19pm - misc - by asshalf15 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35180) - you deserved it (11509)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at my grandma's funeral. While giving the eulogy, I accidentally mixed up "You will be missed" and "You won't be forgotten" and instead said "You won't be missed." FML

#21212849
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42427) - you deserved it (6831)

On 07/18/2014 at 12:30pm - misc - by familyhatesme - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: