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Speibrand

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Speibrand
  • Town/Country : Castletown, Hyrule
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 425
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Speibrand : A little about myself umm I like video games and anime
Some of my favourites are Death Note, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, Fairy Tail, Ouran Highschool, and Fruits Basket :)

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Speibrand's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Speibrand's badges

Speibrand's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52249) - you deserved it (9696)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, due to my boyfriend teasing me about me possibly having been conceived on a beach because I was born in Hawaii, I finally asked my mom if I really was. She said no, but then told me in detail how much sex on a beach hurts when you get sand up your ass. FML

#19991998
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19003) - you deserved it (5039)

On 07/30/2012 at 1:56am - intimacy - by skyplaysguitar - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I walked into my upstairs bathroom to find my mom's new boyfriend eating soup, naked on the toilet. In shock, I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs, backwards, and hit my head on wall, leaving a dent in it. FML

#19984594
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23068) - you deserved it (1792)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Lilragu97 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my friend told me she was going to start drinking gatorade, so she could get the body shape of the athletes on TV. When I tried to explain to her that she'd also need to work out to achieve this, she went nuts and hurled the bottle at my face. FML

#19818788
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23263) - you deserved it (2646)

On 06/20/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by phonnah - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML

#19771597
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17017) - you deserved it (1520)

On 06/11/2012 at 4:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had three things converge that should never be together: my period, hot doctor, and a colonoscopy. FML

#19687199
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28845) - you deserved it (2239)

On 05/27/2012 at 3:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

#19668387
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18730) - you deserved it (4098)

On 05/23/2012 at 4:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I left my number on my receipt for a cute waitress. As I was leaving the bar, she came running out and called me over. I obviously got excited. Turns out I'd forgotten to sign my slip. FML

#19516000
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9228) - you deserved it (16265)

On 04/23/2012 at 9:22am - love - by Dave (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML

#19449601
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28176) - you deserved it (4814)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm - love - by mista_sandy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43688) - you deserved it (4210)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

#18983166
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36922) - you deserved it (8388)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were in the shower, we began to get a bit frisky. That was until I lifted my arms and he immediately made one of his "Chewbacca Calls." He was referring to my armpits that I had forgotten to shave. FML

#18867304
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13637) - you deserved it (24405)

On 01/21/2012 at 12:47am - love - by Reliena (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my teacher, who's Irish, called me insensitive and stupid for imitating her accent. I'm Filipino and my parents immigrated to Ireland where I was born, and then we moved to Canada when I was 14. Her response to my explanation? "Bullshit." FML

#18841081
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32218) - you deserved it (2348)

On 01/18/2012 at 12:21am - misc - by meh - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after getting rear ended by a car, I texted my husband to let him know I was in the hospital. His response? "I'm at Taco Bell." FML

#18515573
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24633) - you deserved it (2665)

On 12/14/2011 at 10:34pm - misc - by Mariah Heimann - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to the smell of bacon. It smelled so good, and made me very hungry. Then I realized it was my neighbor cooking. I have no money or bacon. FML

#18346168
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (3463)

On 11/25/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Username - United States



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