Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Speibrand

Search for a member

Speibrand

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 543
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Speibrand : A little about myself umm I like video games and anime
Some of my favourites are Death Note, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, Fairy Tail, Ouran Highschool, and Fruits Basket :)

Speibrand's page activity

Visits<b>euphoricness</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 8:55pm<b>loufalou</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 7:35am<b>captainerica111</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 1:40am<b>curb_stomp12</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 7:50am<b>nanamarie98</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 7:28pm<b>GiveMeASnickers</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 3:17am<b>xoxoalienator</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 4:12am<b>haley_radford</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 6:04pm<b>jam232</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 11:44pm<b>chuckpanda</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 10:24am<b>striker8898</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 9:29am<b>EightInchNails</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 6:10am<b>slayertack</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 7:46pm<b>nicvic925</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 6:34pm<b>carpetrider93</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 4:17pm<b>gypsyyyyyyyyyyyy</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 3:48pm<b>ajackass</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 3:46pm<b>becka2s</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 3:00pm

Speibrand's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Speibrand's badges

Speibrand's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56301) - you deserved it (10326)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, due to my boyfriend teasing me about me possibly having been conceived on a beach because I was born in Hawaii, I finally asked my mom if I really was. She said no, but then told me in detail how much sex on a beach hurts when you get sand up your ass. FML

#19991998
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24214) - you deserved it (5698)

On 07/30/2012 at 1:56am - intimacy - by skyplaysguitar - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I walked into my upstairs bathroom to find my mom's new boyfriend eating soup, naked on the toilet. In shock, I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs, backwards, and hit my head on wall, leaving a dent in it. FML

#19984594
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24889) - you deserved it (1914)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Lilragu97 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my friend told me she was going to start drinking gatorade, so she could get the body shape of the athletes on TV. When I tried to explain to her that she'd also need to work out to achieve this, she went nuts and hurled the bottle at my face. FML

#19818788
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24911) - you deserved it (2788)

On 06/20/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by phonnah - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML

#19771597
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23008) - you deserved it (2306)

On 06/11/2012 at 4:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had three things converge that should never be together: my period, hot doctor, and a colonoscopy. FML

#19687199
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31523) - you deserved it (2488)

On 05/27/2012 at 3:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

#19668387
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20615) - you deserved it (4401)

On 05/23/2012 at 4:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I left my number on my receipt for a cute waitress. As I was leaving the bar, she came running out and called me over. I obviously got excited. Turns out I'd forgotten to sign my slip. FML

#19516000
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9936) - you deserved it (17793)

On 04/23/2012 at 9:22am - love - by Dave (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML

#19449601
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30587) - you deserved it (5090)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm - love - by mista_sandy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46627) - you deserved it (4528)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

#18983166
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41706) - you deserved it (9086)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were in the shower, we began to get a bit frisky. That was until I lifted my arms and he immediately made one of his "Chewbacca Calls." He was referring to my armpits that I had forgotten to shave. FML

#18867304
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14277) - you deserved it (25265)

On 01/21/2012 at 12:47am - love - by Reliena (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my teacher, who's Irish, called me insensitive and stupid for imitating her accent. I'm Filipino and my parents immigrated to Ireland where I was born, and then we moved to Canada when I was 14. Her response to my explanation? "Bullshit." FML

#18841081
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35820) - you deserved it (2611)

On 01/18/2012 at 12:21am - misc - by meh - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after getting rear ended by a car, I texted my husband to let him know I was in the hospital. His response? "I'm at Taco Bell." FML

#18515573
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27425) - you deserved it (2905)

On 12/14/2011 at 10:34pm - misc - by Mariah Heimann - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to the smell of bacon. It smelled so good, and made me very hungry. Then I realized it was my neighbor cooking. I have no money or bacon. FML

#18346168
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25928) - you deserved it (3668)

On 11/25/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Username - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: