About SpazTheGreat : I rock my socks off.
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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
SpazTheGreat's favorite FMLs
Today, I ran over a cat while driving home. I tried to keep myself together but couldn't help but cry because of how bad I felt. Through my tears I failed to notice a porcupine in the middle of the road. Yep, I hit him too. FML
by anugla / 08/18/2009 at 1:02am / United States (New York) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 08/16/2009 at 2:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I invited everyone to a gig I'm playing at a bar. They closed it down just for me when I told them how many people were attending, and I spent all day setting it up. Turns out nobody showed up besides my mom, my dad, and 2 of my cousins. I still had to play 7 songs in front of them. FML
by playinmyguitar / 08/15/2009 at 11:02am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
Today, my drunk uncle threw my brand new iPhone 3GS into my pool, ruining it completely. When I asked him to pay for the 600 dollar replacement cost, he said he wasn't responsible for his drunken actions. All of my family members are on his side. FML
by Shadyblood / 08/15/2009 at 12:32am / Puerto Rico / Money
by ohgod / 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Iowa) / Kids
Today, I was at a party with my girlfriend and this older guy came in and started talking to me about his rock climbing lessons earlier that week. I told him "I'm really drunk, so I really couldn't give a shit about what you did." It was my girlfriend's father picking her up to go home. FML
by drunkard / 08/13/2009 at 10:16am / Germany (Bayern) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was late for a medical school seminar and test. An SUV flipped over on the highway right in front of me. I held pressure to gushing, lacerated artery until EMS arrived. He lived, but I might have to repeat the whole year because I missed a big test. The test? Emergency response medicine. FML
by doctorchick / 08/11/2009 at 8:58pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, I gave my girlfriend a small stun gun I bought for her. She mentioned how she thought it was ''cute'', though it probably wouldn't help if someone was after her. She then put the tazer to my chest. When I woke up, she told me how it was my fault, for buying it for her. FML
by Ducati / 08/09/2009 at 10:13pm / United States (Florida) / Health
Today, my boyfriend asked me to sniff his armpit to see if he was the one who smelled. I did because we are that comfortable with us. After a couple of sniffs I heard laughter. I forgot I was sitting in his living room and his family was watching me the whole time. I am now the BO finder. FML
by broke_otaku / 08/09/2009 at 12:21am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my family and I were coming back from a trip to the US. As we reached the border patrol we realized that we were one passport short. The border patrol lectured us for 30 minutes about how irresponsible we were for not realizing that they had forgotten to give us one of our passports back. FML
by Anonymous / 08/09/2009 at 12:02am / United States (New York) / Holidays
by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 7:11am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML
by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML
by NoFriends / 08/02/2009 at 1:12pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous
by homework / 07/21/2009 at 3:34am / India (Delhi) / Work
Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML
by emperor / 07/21/2009 at 1:38am / Bangladesh (Dhaka) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…
- Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, returning home, I found my roommate trying one of my bras. When he saw my shocked face, the… Today, I’m on a mission in Africa. My company driver is so old, deaf and half blind that I have to…