Soloman212

Search for a member

Offline (the 05/18/2016 at 4:58pm)

Soloman212

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8476
  • Number of comments : 768
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Soloman212 : I've discovered that taking a hit of heroin into my left pupil allows me to type and read for a short while so I make use of such time lurking FML and posting comments. My life doesn't suck so I don't post any FML's. Being a baboon is so much betyjdyjko gdmlu lqrbd

Soloman212's page activity

Visits<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 3:22pm<b>Jpav1</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 4:52pm<b>AAHHHHH</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 2:08am<b>2simz</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 7:38am<b>Aang558811</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 2:21pm<b>Ginger_Love</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 12:40am<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 4:47pm<b>Skydiver2001</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 2:08pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 4:09pm<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 2:29pm<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 5:33pm<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 10:37am<b>Welshite</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 1:47pm<b>callcopse</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 1:05pm<b>plsdonthateme</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 11:51pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 12:25am<b>Jivesliven</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:23am<b>bullshitspanish</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 10:39pm

Fucked!<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 9:22pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 10:47pm<b>concon4815</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 3:37am<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 12:47am<b>apineapple</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 9:03pm<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 6:10pm<b>AQueenOfDeath</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 8:58pm<b>winterforever97</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 10:33pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 2:59pm<b>dylanger16</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 5:48pm<b>RipeFlame</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 2:54am

Soloman212's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Soloman212's badges

Soloman212's favorite FMLs

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm / New Zealand / Kids

Today, despite all of the empty seats on the bus, a man sat next to me. So close to me that our legs touched. After a few moments of silence, he got closer and whispered in my ear, "You're so quiet." FML

by SofaKingPretty / 07/26/2014 at 7:40pm / United States (California) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as I was putting on sports shoes to get to a job interview in a hurry, a man ran past me and grabbed my formal shoes while shouting, "Ninja!" Try explaining to the guy at the interview why I was wearing sneakers with a skirt suit. FML

by Baskets-Tailleur / 07/07/2014 at 2:58am / France / Love

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

by zl5 / 07/04/2014 at 7:17pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Work

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

by failed dad / 06/25/2014 at 8:30am / Greece (Attiki) / Kids

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

by possibly fucked / 06/22/2014 at 4:34pm / Portugal (Lisboa) / Intimacy

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

by FLIPmcCOOL / 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm / Ireland (Cork) / Intimacy

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

by livingamongtheflowers / 05/15/2014 at 1:40am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm / United States (South Carolina) / Animals

Today, I met a cute guy, and everything went great. After a while, he asked me for my number and I gave it to him. Now he won't stop texting me, asking for pictures of my toes. FML

by ewhy / 04/23/2014 at 2:37pm / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm / Norway (Nordland) / Work

Today, my boss decided to have the whole staff drug tested and fire everyone who failed. Out of an original staff of 14 people, only my boss, two coworkers and I remain. I now have four times my normal workload and am seriously thinking maybe I should've said "Yes" to drugs. FML

by bringthemback / 03/29/2014 at 6:34am / United States (South Carolina) / Work

Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML

by Anon / 03/12/2014 at 8:11pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work