Sneaky95

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Offline (the 08/30/2014 at 5:11am)

Sneaky95

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 February 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1790
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Sneaky95 : Names Matthew Valentin ima sneaky Puerto Rican or so I've been told lol

Sneaky95's page activity

Visits<b>annamaria55555</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 6:35pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 11:27am<b>Zeus1070</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 8:43pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 1:59am<b>Kaylea816</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 10:57pm<b>LuckyStar15</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 5:19am<b>Paintonmyarms214</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 7:34pm<b>justineelizabeth</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 1:51am<b>ignoremeimweird</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 10:25am<b>supersavvy</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 10:33am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 04/26/2013 at 9:50am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 7:16pm<b>xToryBear</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 1:46am<b>Tika876</b> - the 03/30/2013 at 11:29pm<b>gman123999</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 6:34pm<b>cb1002630</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 12:02am<b>hernaaandez</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 11:37pm<b>dancinwookie</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 9:40pm

Sneaky95's FML badges

50 favourites

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Sneaky95's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML

by Watchtower? More like fortress. / 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm / Norway (Oslo) / Miscellaneous

Today, while mowing the lawn, I was attacked by an underground hornet nest. I now have many stings, two scared dogs, and a mower still running outside. The hornets are swarming it and some are sitting on the lever, as if to turn it off. It's like they know. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2012 at 4:08pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I unintentionally moaned during my prostate exam. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2012 at 2:06pm / Netherlands (Gelderland) / Intimacy

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

by identitychangeplease / 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

by MeanMother / 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML

by whoslade / 06/28/2012 at 1:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from a knee surgery. I asked my mother to get me a glass of water. She replied, "You can get it, you're not crippled. Oh wait, yeah you are" and laughed hysterically. FML

by crippy / 06/26/2012 at 1:01am / United States / Health

Today, I came home from work to find a burglar in my house. He then said that he was just leaving, and went back out of the broken window. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

by justgreat / 03/23/2012 at 10:30pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML

by Eet- / 10/13/2011 at 3:20pm / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Love

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

by squishylog / 08/12/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

by gir / 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML

by Kate / 06/07/2011 at 3:50am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, both of the roads leading to my small town were washed out by rising flood waters. I now live on an island in the middle of Wyoming. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2011 at 1:54pm / United States (Wyoming) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy