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Sneaky95

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Sneaky95
  • Town/Country : Ridgewood
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 February 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 82
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Sneaky95 : Names Matthew Valentin ima sneaky Puerto Rican or so I've been told lol

Sneaky95's last visitors

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50 favourites

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Sneaky95's favorite FMLs

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41582) - you deserved it (2759)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55608) - you deserved it (4770)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

#20640901
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44107) - you deserved it (6068)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, my parents threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't agree to convert to their new brand of Christianity. This is a day after they ranted at me about how I should speak my mind more and not let myself be controlled by other people. FML

#20628024
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39355) - you deserved it (2614)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML

#20627981
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25223) - you deserved it (55408)

On 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia

Today, I popped a pimple while stopped at a red light. When I looked over the woman in the car next to me was hysterically laughing, and had her camera phone out. FML

#20627066
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35100) - you deserved it (13308)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:28am - health - by msarosi - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my car was stolen from the parking garage, the same one I work at as a security guard. FML

#20625733
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34708) - you deserved it (21163)

On 04/27/2013 at 6:05pm - work - by naps aren't what they used to be (man) - United States

Today, I had to go to the emergency room with my sister, due to involuntary muscle spasms she was having. They gave her a muscle relaxer which caused her to be extremely tired and loopy. She decided to start singing loudly with a song she made up about butt fucking. FML

#20624720
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43849) - you deserved it (3943)

On 04/27/2013 at 8:42am - health - by seekerglow176 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

#20624598
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46653) - you deserved it (2732)

On 04/27/2013 at 4:28am - misc - by whathehell (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

#20624343
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48788) - you deserved it (9999)

On 04/27/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my son had to help out at the local retirement home for his community service. He got in serious trouble and came whining to me about it after he tried threatening some of the residents into taking part in a Harlem Shake video. FML

#20623837
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34928) - you deserved it (4779)

On 04/26/2013 at 8:21pm - kids - by Shitty genes, no two ways about it. (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had to explain to my friend that the hot girl he's been sending nudes to and cybering with for the past month is probably a bored, fat-as-fuck, balding male living in his mum's basement. The look on his face after I proved that "her" pictures were fake broke my heart. FML

#20623794
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36300) - you deserved it (6973)

On 04/26/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by sanoria51 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML

#20623167
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41337) - you deserved it (2228)

On 04/26/2013 at 2:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Baja California)

Today, while he was eating chicken, one of my friends asked me why I'm a vegetarian. I responded that I believe in animal rights and don't like the conditions the animals are forced to live in. He looked at me incredulously before explaining that "chickens aren't animals, they're birds." FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

#20622674
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65032) - you deserved it (8399)

On 04/26/2013 at 5:17am - love - by Anonymous -



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