Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Smurple6

Offline (the 10/23/2014 at 6:09am) | Search for a member

Smurple6

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2111
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Smurple6's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 12:13am<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 11:15pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 12:05pm<b>Asdruben22</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 11:29am<b>assassinbanana0</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 7:19pm<b>30361</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 1:58am<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 4:43am<b>zeropointnine</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 2:33pm<b>carleybeak</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 5:19pm<b>robbie12321</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 7:43pm

Smurple6's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Smurple6's badges

Smurple6's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to feed an elderly man in the care home in which I work while he was whacking off. Our work policy states that I have to pretend not to notice. FML

#20865686
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59780) - you deserved it (4262)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:30am - intimacy - by poolgirl789 (woman) - United Kingdom (Bradford)

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

#20865525
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41468) - you deserved it (4593)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my company is doing so bad that I had to take down my symbolic first dollar so that I could buy a roll of crackers for dinner. FML

#20865414
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44679) - you deserved it (3388)

On 09/02/2013 at 11:03pm - work - by smurftastic (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was telling my brother about how my new colleagues and I don't share a sense of humour. He replied, "What, you mean they don't pretend to laugh at your jokes like everybody else?" FML

#20864858
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33154) - you deserved it (5372)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:40pm - work - by laughing-stock - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My bestfriend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

#20864835
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36888) - you deserved it (3036)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
518 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17865) - you deserved it (128599)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was grounded by my dad for "popping pills like a gangbanger". I take prescription ADHD medicine and a multi-vitamin. FML

#20863675
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37444) - you deserved it (2684)

On 09/01/2013 at 9:15pm - love - by zephyrgk - United States (Illinois)

Today, my friend told me she turned down a job as a babysitter because she didn't want to be secretly videotaped, as she knew the people had a nanny cam. I wasn't aware of this when I took that same job a few nights ago and asked my boyfriend to come by. We had sex on their couch. FML

#20862871
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25930) - you deserved it (90324)

On 09/01/2013 at 5:57am - intimacy - by happyturtle (woman) - Croatia

Today, a lady cussed me out for not bringing her salad and pizza to her table. She then wanted her money back. I work at a buffet; a self-serve buffet. FML

#20859830
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44696) - you deserved it (2452)

On 08/30/2013 at 12:33am - work - by pizza girl - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

Today, I asked a cute guy for his number but instead he gave it to my gay friend. When my friend later called him, it turned out that he'd given him his number just to get rid of me and wasn't expecting him to call. FML

#20858957
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37952) - you deserved it (3240)

On 08/29/2013 at 6:44am - love - by sorejecteditmakesmewannacry (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was fired when a customer called corporate, saying I was unprofessional and rude. The "customer" in question was my little sister, who I would not let buy beer with a fake ID. FML

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55882) - you deserved it (4422)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, half-way through my trip to Florida, I received a call from my friend of six years. "I sort of had sex with your girlfriend while you were gone." He said it "just sort of happened." FML

#20855295
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56208) - you deserved it (4067)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was formally diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive tendencies. My mom saw this as an excuse to make me clean the whole house top to bottom, because "Hey, you love to clean." FML

#20855277
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42575) - you deserved it (3424)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by ocdistheworst (woman) - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: