Smurple6

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Offline (the 11/13/2015 at 9:36pm)

Smurple6

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7630
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Smurple6's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 12:13am<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 11:15pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 12:05pm<b>Asdruben22</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 11:29am<b>assassinbanana0</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 7:19pm<b>30361</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 1:58am<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 4:43am<b>zeropointnine</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 2:33pm<b>carleybeak</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 5:19pm<b>robbie12321</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 7:43pm

Smurple6's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Smurple6's badges

Smurple6's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents grounded me for being "addicted" to drugs because I've been taking pain meds every four hours. I had my wisdom teeth taken out yesterday, and my face is badly swollen. FML

by lauren_crewd / 11/23/2013 at 6:56pm / United States (Alabama) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I realized that no matter what I accomplish in life, I'll always be remembered for being the son of a woman so stupid that she claimed she used to be Elvis Presley's mistress. She was still an infant when he died. FML

by fs / 11/23/2013 at 6:45pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to have a talk with my stalker. After telling him not to snapchat me, not to text me, and that I'm not interested, all he said was "I think persistence is going to be key here." FML

by AshleyRose24 / 11/23/2013 at 3:02am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML

by quit fucking up my life / 11/22/2013 at 8:08pm / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, I sent a group text round to my friends asking if they wanted to hang out sometime. One of my friends thought this was aimed directly at her and confessed her love for me. FML

by awkwardpaul / 11/22/2013 at 5:18am / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Love

Today, I woke up to something tickling me. Thinking it was my cat, I reached under the covers to give her a friendly scratch behind the ears. I imagine the giant spider that was actually there enjoyed my terrified screams. FML

by thatsnotacat / 11/21/2013 at 12:52pm / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

by smooth / 11/21/2013 at 11:10am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

by oops999 / 11/19/2013 at 2:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a psychiatrist for the first time. After telling her everything I'm going through, she looked at me and said "You know... every five years or so I get a case completely beyond my ability to help." I guess it's been five years. FML

by elle / 11/19/2013 at 12:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I watched my mother tell a man that the holocaust was "a good thing" and "necessary for population control". That man was my girlfriend's father. Who is Jewish. FML

by Colby / 11/15/2013 at 11:59am / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's ex moved into the apartment beneath us. She's already called the cops on us for a noise complaint twice. We were sleeping. It's going to be a long year. FML

by Anonymous / 11/12/2013 at 2:12pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

by fuck you, bitchcake / 11/10/2013 at 1:26pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

by f / 11/09/2013 at 6:30pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, while working at Chipotle, a teenage girl asked in all seriousness if she "could have a steak burrito, but with like, chicken instead?" FML

by fmylyfe / 11/09/2013 at 9:15am / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

by thank god you'll only live once / 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work