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Sleepy340

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Sleepy340

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 March 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 873
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Sleepy340's page activity

Visits<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 3:15pm

Sleepy340's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Sleepy340's favorite FMLs

Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

#20071617
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23537) - you deserved it (1936)

On 09/14/2012 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, in the middle of what had to be the most amazing blowjob I've ever had in my life, my girlfriend had a mental breakdown and began weeping on top of my cock. FML

#20070700
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30658) - you deserved it (7445)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by blueballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 2-year-old cat finally decided to start catching mice. Like any other cat would, she left it for me to find. I found it in the middle of the night, as my bare foot rolled its guts out of its ass. FML

#20068907
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23769) - you deserved it (2047)

On 09/12/2012 at 2:31pm - animals - by shadokis (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I came home from work to be given $1 by my mother. This normally would have been nice, had my mother not said, "I just sold that ugly old black and white picture frame you always leave lying around in your room." Which also would have been nice if that "frame" wasn't my Kindle. FML

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44582) - you deserved it (3888)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dog, who has been specially trained to go for help when I'm having a seizure, went to alert my parents downstairs that I was having an emergency. The "emergency" was me masturbating. FML

#20052579
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33019) - you deserved it (10268)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by thewhompingwillow (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I discovered why the milk in my house has a funny, sweet taste. My family has been pouring the leftover milk from their cereal back into the carton. FML

#20045388
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26733) - you deserved it (1610)

On 08/27/2012 at 10:57pm - misc - by spekledworf - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend I love her and that I never want us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. FML

#20021274
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21320) - you deserved it (2431)

On 08/14/2012 at 8:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was fooling around on Omegle, when I came across a guy who claimed he could suck himself off. I was doubtful, but morbidly curious, so I told him to prove it. Turns out he could. Before I could close the browser window in horror, my dad walked in and got a good look too. FML

#20018573
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11568) - you deserved it (32891)

On 08/13/2012 at 11:06am - intimacy - by didntevenknow (woman) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, the air bag system in my car somehow malfunctioned, and the air bag inflated while I was driving, causing me to lose control and crash into a street light. I ended up with a badly bruised face because the air bag had already deflated by then. FML

#20018268
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23537) - you deserved it (1385)

On 08/13/2012 at 4:06am - health - by stupid_airbag (man) - Australia

Today, while I was getting intimate with my husband, he moaned someone else's name. He actually tried to explain himself by saying that he'd had a "divine encounter," and while "possessed by the Lord," he'd been told the name of our future daughter. FML

#20003981
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35353) - you deserved it (2567)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by lils (woman) - United States

Today, I was pooping at a local Target when I heard someone say "You need to eat more solids, you're pooping like a rabbit." FML

#20001897
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21247) - you deserved it (3669)

On 08/04/2012 at 7:35am - misc - by llaurenmariee - United States

Today, I was sitting under a rather large house plant in my dining room, minding my own business when a spider lowered itself right in front of my face. It startled me, causing me to gasp, which resulted in me inhaling the spider. I then spent 3 minutes choking on it. FML

#19998761
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25063) - you deserved it (2695)

On 08/02/2012 at 5:08pm - misc - by danonno (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was sitting under a rather large house plant in my dining room, minding my own business when a spider lowered itself right in front of my face. It startled me, causing me to gasp, which resulted in me inhaling the spider. I then spent 3 minutes choking on it. FML

#19998761
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25063) - you deserved it (2695)

On 08/02/2012 at 5:08pm - misc - by danonno (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML

#19994389
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7988) - you deserved it (46435)

On 07/31/2012 at 11:53am - love - by TheMissMuffly (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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