Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SleepingSkulls

Search for a member

SleepingSkulls

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 March 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1621
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SleepingSkulls : Message me if you wanna chat. (:

SleepingSkulls's page activity

Visits<b>misterjg540</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 8:26pm<b>odinhasaboner</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 4:12pm<b>skippydoda</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 8:26am<b>whitechick305</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 2:14am<b>DukeOfSojo</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 3:52pm<b>Bgrish</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 2:14am<b>sarah_baby22</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 7:03pm<b>skeeter551</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 12:28pm<b>annabrandl</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 1:40pm<b>LilsBills300</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 11:05am<b>Doubtful_Judge</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 2:43pm<b>lesnot</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 3:38pm<b>Schala360</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 8:12am<b>quangthuchien</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 1:40am<b>Zman2017</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 12:33am<b>Star1398</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:05pm<b>_awwhellnaw_</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 5:43am<b>PatriciaAra</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:23am

SleepingSkulls's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

SleepingSkulls's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
416 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50294) - you deserved it (8182)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

#15430260
698 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73991) - you deserved it (16061)

On 03/22/2011 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML

#15426482
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50776) - you deserved it (28393)

On 03/22/2011 at 1:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38629) - you deserved it (32148)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

#15405912
488 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36629) - you deserved it (50717)

On 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm - kids - by failureparent (man) - United States (California)

Today, my son was on Facebook while he was supposed to be studying. He called me a liar and accused me of making up excuses to chew him out. How do I know he was online? He liked and commented on a video I posted. My son is a dumbass. FML

#15398872
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49165) - you deserved it (8438)

On 03/20/2011 at 12:10pm - kids - by parenting_failure (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I finally got the courage to say to my boyfriend that I feel invisible and ignored. To this he said 'You aren't invisible, I mean, look at that nose.' FML

#15365098
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36780) - you deserved it (7194)

On 03/18/2011 at 8:36am - love - by anon -

Today, I swerved out of the way to avoid hitting a squirrel, and in the process hit another squirrel. FML

#15364776
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35602) - you deserved it (10260)

On 03/18/2011 at 7:28am - misc - by karmavictim -

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43986) - you deserved it (11732)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, I lost my cat. It's deaf, so no matter what I do it can't hear me. FML

#15251582
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43760) - you deserved it (4666)

On 03/09/2011 at 3:03pm - animals - by blahhlovely_30 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I lost my cat. It's deaf, so no matter what I do it can't hear me. FML

#15251582
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43760) - you deserved it (4666)

On 03/09/2011 at 3:03pm - animals - by blahhlovely_30 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML

#15251032
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51179) - you deserved it (4574)

On 03/09/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by crazystar69 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend called me and dumped me. Thirty minutes later he called asking for me back. When I asked why, he said "The other girl dumped me." FML

#15248393
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45664) - you deserved it (4303)

On 03/09/2011 at 3:27am - love - by life_isnt_fair (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, as I couldn't get the airplane seat buckle to buckle, I faced the fact that I've been in denial about how fat I have become. The people in my row faced it too as I began to sob uncontrollably. FML

#15240526
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19335) - you deserved it (34152)

On 03/08/2011 at 1:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered that the demonic voice that made me nearly piss myself all night, was my sister's Furby she stuck in the closet. FML

#15219004
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39589) - you deserved it (6839)

On 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm - misc - by Spooked (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: