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About SkoomaKi : (Skuu-ma-kee)
Lurked since early 2010, then I finally decided to make an account in 2011.
I like all regular commenters =)
Enjoy my tales.
The Moderators - Stories tell of Gods who walk among the FML commenters, keeping peace and prosperity throughout the community.
Perdix - Some say he is commenter who has been here since the beginning of FML, and even the universe.
DocBastard - Legends tell of a medically fascinated doctor. Not much is known about him, just his intellect.
NoorFML - No one knows much about her, except her relations with Ezio (her husband). She is also a ninja (well tries to be).
Baustigt - Tales tell of an owner just as crazy as her dog. The dog named Dula, can destroy worlds.
KyleeKay – Myths explain this girl’s obsession with the workings of human emotion. Her rational and ideal advice is wise to follow.
ManInTheMachine – A cyborg whom's consciousness is formed by it's computer program forming random code.
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Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML
Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML
Today, I decided to spray tan myself. Five minutes later, I had to pee, so I did. Not only do I now have two orange stripes on my toilet bowl, but I also have two big white stripes on the back of my thighs. FML
Today, I found out my 12 year old daughter is going through a bit of an "emotional" stage. I got a call from her school saying she was sitting in the corner at recess trying to cut her wrist. With a plastic spoon. FML