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SkoomaKi

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SkoomaKi
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4673
  • Number of comments : 1776
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About SkoomaKi : (Skuu-ma-kee)

Lurked since early 2010, then I finally decided to make an account in 2011.

I like all regular commenters =)

Enjoy my tales.

The Moderators - Stories tell of Gods who walk among the FML commenters, keeping peace and prosperity throughout the community.

Perdix - Some say he is commenter who has been here since the beginning of FML, and even the universe.

DocBastard - Legends tell of a medically fascinated doctor. Not much is known about him, just his intellect.

NoorFML - No one knows much about her, except her relations with Ezio (her husband). She is also a ninja (well tries to be).

Baustigt - Tales tell of an owner just as crazy as her dog. The dog named Dula, can destroy worlds.

KyleeKay – Myths explain this girl’s obsession with the workings of human emotion. Her rational and ideal advice is wise to follow.

ManInTheMachine – A cyborg whom's consciousness is formed by it's computer program forming random code.

SkoomaKi's last visitors

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SkoomaKi's FML badges

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SkoomaKi's favorite FMLs

Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML

#19521311
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6652) - you deserved it (15196)

On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)

Today, I paid for someone else's pee so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML

#19520767
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6343) - you deserved it (44984)

On 04/24/2012 at 4:29am - work - by xharmonyx - United States

Today, I left my number on my receipt for a cute waitress. As I was leaving the bar, she came running out and called me over. I obviously got excited. Turns out I'd forgotten to sign my slip. FML

#19516000
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6780) - you deserved it (2785)

On 04/23/2012 at 9:22am - love - by Dave (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking across a pedestrian crossing and waved at the driver of the car who'd stopped, just to say thank you. She stuck her middle finger up at me. FML

#19515959
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15445) - you deserved it (2053)

On 04/23/2012 at 9:00am - misc - by hoggypig -

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

#19515625
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26335) - you deserved it (2316)

On 04/23/2012 at 5:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I realized just how awful my relationships have been when I discovered I emotionally connect with women on Jerry Springer. FML

#19511364
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12977) - you deserved it (3713)

On 04/22/2012 at 2:14pm - love - by Coquette (woman) - United States

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

#19511225
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15163) - you deserved it (1517)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML

Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20714) - you deserved it (7959)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20714) - you deserved it (7959)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20714) - you deserved it (7959)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)

Today, I discovered I have really bad dandruff. I learned this when I went indoor mini golfing and my whole upper body lit up like a Christmas tree underneath the black light. Among my friends I'm now known as the abominable snowman. FML

#19509348
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15852) - you deserved it (3301)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:24am - health - by Andrew7847 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my fiancé has been cheating on me for the past month. The lady he has been seeing is a choreographer that was teaching him how to dance salsa for our wedding rehearsal. FML

#19509327
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23328) - you deserved it (1477)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:20am - love - by Gennifer - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was on the bus during rush hour. A fly started buzzing around my head, and I swatted at it, at the exact moment the woman beside me decided to get out of her seat and put her face straight in the path of my hand. FML

#19502060
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16503) - you deserved it (1829)

On 04/20/2012 at 5:48pm - misc - by apparentlyawomanbeater (man) - Switzerland (Ticino)



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