SkoomaKi

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Offline (the 05/12/2016 at 5:25pm)

SkoomaKi

57Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11058
  • Number of comments : 1781
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About SkoomaKi : (Skuu-ma-kee)

Lurked since early 2010, then I finally decided to make an account in 2011.

I like all regular commenters =)

Enjoy my tales.

The Moderators - Stories tell of Gods who walk among the FML commenters, keeping peace and prosperity throughout the community.

Perdix - Some say he is commenter who has been here since the beginning of FML, even the universe.

DocBastard - Legends tell of a medically fascinated doctor. Not much is known about him, just his intellect.

NoorFML - No one knows much about her, except her relations with Ezio (her husband). She is also a ninja.

Baustigt - Tales tell of an owner just as crazy as her dog. The dog, named Dula, can destroy worlds.

KyleeKay – Myths explain this girl’s obsession with the workings of human emotion. Her rational and ideal advice is wise to follow.

ManInTheMachine – A cyborg whom's consciousness is formed by it's computer program forming random code.

SkoomaKi's page activity

Visits<b>Sam611001</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 1:45pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 8:43pm<b>Blashay18</b> - the 08/14/2016 at 11:41pm<b>Infamous_Pickle</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 9:05am<b>midnight1890</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 12:01am<b>Fluffyturtle21</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 9:32pm<b>hwhayes01</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 2:29am<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 10:27pm<b>igottapee</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 6:21pm<b>xanhx</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 7:37am<b>Kyxul</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 11:23pm<b>Gwen4var</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 12:51am<b>Noobish_Elk</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 9:29am<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 12:54am<b>flyingflies</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 6:22am<b>riandcheysmom</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 6:59pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 3:35pm<b>walker9879</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 1:26pm

Fucked!<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 7:00pm<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 6:54am<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 9:35pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 9:22am<b>igottapee</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 7:31am<b>ADOG2645</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 8:18pm<b>stingray112</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 9:16pm<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 9:03pm<b>jojocircus19</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 4:04am<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 4:50am<b>minkyman1935</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 2:36pm<b>HowlingFire</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:24pm<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 6:52am<b>Tacogamer20</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 8:23pm<b>walker9879</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 11:30pm<b>PotatoesAndCake</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 12:55am<b>Myorafield</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 3:09am<b>bps2007</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 2:08pm

SkoomaKi's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SkoomaKi's badges

SkoomaKi's favorite FMLs

Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML

by lon01t / 05/07/2012 at 4:43pm / United Kingdom (Falkirk) / Kids

Today, I got an inconvenient erection while at my girlfriends house, so I tried to think of something stupid to get rid of it. I tried thinking of Pokémon, which actually made me harder. FML

by me / 05/07/2012 at 4:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, the father of my child couldn't understand why he had been laid off from his job as a painter's assistant. He couldn't find a broom or vacuum, so he "cleaned" a carpet by laying down strips of painter's tape and pulling it up. FML

by notrocketscience / 05/07/2012 at 11:57am / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, while at work as a cashier, I tried to be sweet and ID an elderly man buying a bottle of wine. He responded by calling me a "blind-ass bitch" and calling my manager for "harassing" him. FML

by zomg / 04/30/2012 at 5:24am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2012 at 5:45am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2012 at 12:41am / United States / Transportation

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2012 at 11:24am / United States / Love

Today, I put my ironing board away in the bathroom. After closing the door, I heard a loud noise. The board had opened up while falling over, taking up the width of the room. I can't open the door. FML

by Magicgwen / 04/26/2012 at 4:45pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I was hanging out with some of my friends when I fell asleep. When I woke up, I found that they had shaved the F word into my arm. I don't know what is more disturbing: the fact that this is what my friends do for fun, or that I have enough arm hair to have four letters shaved into it. FML

by HAIRY / 04/26/2012 at 4:23pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided not to wear any makeup. I got told 13 times at work that I looked ill. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2012 at 3:17pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found the best cure for constipation is having my brother scare the literal shit out of me, in Walmart. FML

by crazyk2468 / 04/26/2012 at 1:29pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML

by A Henderson / 04/25/2012 at 4:50pm / United States / Work

Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML

by :| / 04/25/2012 at 2:46pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally found the jewelry my two-year-old son had lost when it got lodged in my foot. FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2012 at 10:33am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my husband announced that he wants to separate emotionally. Meanwhile, he still wants me to cook and clean for him while he dates his new girlfriend. FML

by anonymous / 04/24/2012 at 2:18pm / United States / Love