SkoomaKi

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Offline (the 05/12/2016 at 5:25pm)

SkoomaKi

54Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9476
  • Number of comments : 1781
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About SkoomaKi : (Skuu-ma-kee)

Lurked since early 2010, then I finally decided to make an account in 2011.

I like all regular commenters =)

Enjoy my tales.

The Moderators - Stories tell of Gods who walk among the FML commenters, keeping peace and prosperity throughout the community.

Perdix - Some say he is commenter who has been here since the beginning of FML, even the universe.

DocBastard - Legends tell of a medically fascinated doctor. Not much is known about him, just his intellect.

NoorFML - No one knows much about her, except her relations with Ezio (her husband). She is also a ninja.

Baustigt - Tales tell of an owner just as crazy as her dog. The dog, named Dula, can destroy worlds.

KyleeKay – Myths explain this girl’s obsession with the workings of human emotion. Her rational and ideal advice is wise to follow.

ManInTheMachine – A cyborg whom's consciousness is formed by it's computer program forming random code.

SkoomaKi's page activity

Visits<b>_VerSus_</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 4:08am<b>SpectreZ</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 7:14am<b>gavthewarealpaca</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 5:42am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 3:22am<b>CharlieViescas</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 7:48am<b>399</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 10:59am<b>igottapee</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 1:31am<b>ADOG2645</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:13pm<b>ShockBlast8879</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 8:29pm<b>walker9879</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 4:57pm<b>that1dude1</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 1:58pm<b>krazy789</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 1:42pm<b>Myeyesbleed</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 11:11am<b>Baustigt</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:59pm<b>ajk168</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 4:35am<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 4:30pm<b>OptimusSlime</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 3:50pm<b>stingray112</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:47am

Fucked!<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 9:22am<b>igottapee</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 7:31am<b>ADOG2645</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 8:18pm<b>stingray112</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 9:16pm<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 9:03pm<b>jojocircus19</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 4:04am<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 4:50am<b>minkyman1935</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 2:36pm<b>HowlingFire</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:24pm<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 6:52am<b>Tacogamer20</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 8:23pm<b>walker9879</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 11:30pm<b>PotatoesAndCake</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 12:55am<b>Myorafield</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 3:09am<b>bps2007</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 2:08pm<b>marigavino</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 4:46pm<b>Val0</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 2:54pm<b>Venister</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 6:08am

SkoomaKi's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SkoomaKi's badges

SkoomaKi's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2013 at 3:51am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

by cortanaisahobot / 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I walked too close to a first-aid kit sticking out of a wall at work, and it cut my arm. Laughing at the irony, I opened it to get a band aid out. It was empty. FML

by Ian Artis / 07/12/2012 at 2:28pm / United States / Work

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

by MeanMother / 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML

by whoslade / 06/28/2012 at 1:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a new set of acrylic nails put on. While driving home, I had an urge to pick my nose. My car then went over a speed-bump. I now feel like my brain is bleeding. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2012 at 8:42am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents think it's so hot outside that it's okay for them to work in the garden naked. FML

by Ladieda / 05/28/2012 at 6:15am / Netherlands (Gelderland) / Miscellaneous

Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML

by namenlos / 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, in the middle of a localised drought, and an accompanying hosepipe ban, my mother has decided that she still needs to water her lawn. To balance out the water usage, she's placed a complete ban on the use of our shower until the weather lets up. FML

by gazza / 05/26/2012 at 4:41pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized the only reason my phone ever rings is because someone needs help with their computer. FML

by that guy / 05/24/2012 at 12:41pm / United States / Geek

Today, my boyfriend started laughing during sex because my boobs are slightly different. He then broke up with me after I pointed out that his nuts aren't exactly even either. FML

by anonymous / 05/14/2012 at 6:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

by 504-A1 / 05/11/2012 at 6:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

by Amy / 05/10/2012 at 3:14pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML

by tinydancer / 05/10/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my job life-guarding, when a woman pushed the spine-board over, hitting me on the back of my head. She laughed, but I now have a concussion and a stiff neck, and my co-workers can't stop laughing at the "irony." FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 10:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Work