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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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SirJamie77

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SirJamie77
  • Town/Country : England
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1584
  • Number of comments : 94
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SirJamie77 : I've covered wars y'know.

SirJamie77's last visitors

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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SirJamie77's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that Google+ has been automatically uploading my cell phone pictures as I take them. My friends have now seen pictures of me, my penis, and other things too horrifying to talk about. FML

#18945896 (226)

I agree, your life sucks (3784) - you deserved it (11631)

On 01/29/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by brannie - United States

Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML

#18793525 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (7135) - you deserved it (943)

On 01/13/2012 at 5:47am - intimacy - by doctorsandnurses (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

#18738481 (289)

I agree, your life sucks (7618) - you deserved it (3104)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:12pm - misc - by Jman6295 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059 (198)

I agree, your life sucks (24595) - you deserved it (3694)

On 12/16/2011 at 9:29pm - kids - by DocBastard - Reserved

Today, I drove into the parking lot at work, and discovered too late that there were patches of ice everywhere. As I turned to enter my usual spot, I lost control of the vehicle, and despite my pleas, praying, and profanity, it glided straight into my boss' car. FML

#18469057 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (8653) - you deserved it (992)

On 12/09/2011 at 3:14pm - work - by charliebravo77 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913 (15)

I agree, your life sucks (2777) - you deserved it (24248)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, I found out why I'm always let off easy when I do something wrong at work. They think I have a mental handicap. I don't. I'm just clumsy and forgetful. FML

#18362430 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (17363) - you deserved it (3720)

On 11/27/2011 at 1:02am - work - by Clumsy & Forgetful - Canada

Today, I went camping and shared a tent with this girl I have been sleeping with here and there for a year. To impress her, I popped a certain male enhancement supplement. Thirty minutes later I found out she was on her period. What a long night. FML

#18300773 (223)

I agree, your life sucks (7454) - you deserved it (24876)

On 11/20/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by johnnydoe6969 - United States

Today, my social-awkwardness is so bad, I was actually proud of myself for managing to ask someone a question. FML

#18244071 (177)

I agree, your life sucks (18050) - you deserved it (2988)

On 11/14/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by ish0rty - United States

Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML

#18036176 (160)

I agree, your life sucks (1836) - you deserved it (14511)

On 10/21/2011 at 12:57am - misc - by crankg - United States (Ohio)

Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML

#18022351 (346)

I agree, your life sucks (9695) - you deserved it (1821)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:03am - kids - by optimistic2628 - United States

Today, I had a job interview. The only moment I impressed the interviewer was when I talked about drama. He started to talk about a play I hadn't seen, but I decided to agree on everything he was saying. Suddenly he said, "the play doesn't actually exist." I silently left the room. FML

#17912138 (85)

I agree, your life sucks (5961) - you deserved it (20481)

On 10/05/2011 at 4:33pm - work - by Lyingg (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386 (716)

I agree, your life sucks (22600) - you deserved it (32954)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML

#17556947 (441)

I agree, your life sucks (21045) - you deserved it (3600)

On 08/23/2011 at 10:46am - intimacy - by Andrew (man) - United States

Today, I watched my neighbor bring his dogs into my yard to let them empty their piss-pipes and poop-chutes. He does this twice a day. I put a "cut it out" sign up. His dogs peed on the sign and knocked it down. My lawn is a landmine of dog logs and I don't know what to do, besides installing actual landmines. FML

#17547030 (679)

I agree, your life sucks (8467) - you deserved it (1489)

On 08/22/2011 at 10:57am - animals - by rearwindow - United States (Arkansas)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.