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SirEskimo

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SirEskimo

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1226
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About SirEskimo : I'm just here to laugh, and occasionally make others laugh with me.

SirEskimo's page activity

Visits<b>swasher</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 7:59am<b>maria95aa</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 5:04pm<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 4:43pm<b>Jaager</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 1:22pm<b>Brebuscus</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 4:36pm<b>dont1rape1me</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 11:41pm<b>abattior</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 12:53am<b>idkyiam</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 11:34pm<b>garage</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 4:30pm<b>Tamara93</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 7:09pm<b>Rag_dollxx</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:26pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 6:51am<b>AnnDarnell</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 11:31pm<b>brolin_burrito</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 3:29pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 8:29am<b>stargirl097</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 12:51am<b>ilovemychem</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 8:02pm<b>JustBeingAwesome</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 6:53pm

SirEskimo's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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SirEskimo's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76060) - you deserved it (3700)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old son apparently practicing his oral sex skills on the crotch of one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML

#20765717
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51060) - you deserved it (4866)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:45pm - kids - by The fuck, junior? (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML

#20765683
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42535) - you deserved it (7135)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:29pm - misc - by he's a dawk, and a cunt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was explaining to my son that porn isn't a realistic depiction of sex. Just as I finished explaining to him that threesomes rarely happen in real life, he started crying. I feel like a dream-crushing monster. FML

#20756438
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47635) - you deserved it (9268)

On 06/30/2013 at 5:44pm - kids - by sorry, kiddo (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72983) - you deserved it (7222)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

#20709788
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50792) - you deserved it (3470)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Isle of Man

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65651) - you deserved it (18715)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

#20695159
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63074) - you deserved it (5066)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML

#20673142
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49912) - you deserved it (7004)

On 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77259) - you deserved it (5280)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, I finally convinced my mom to read Fight Club. As English isn't her first language, she occasionally asked me to translate some of the words. Her latest question: "What's a dildo?" FML

#20657087
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28388) - you deserved it (37976)

On 05/11/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by joeidk (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML

#20648219
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42256) - you deserved it (3146)

On 05/07/2013 at 6:13pm - misc - by fuckingjesusgran (man) - Bosnia and Herzegovina (Federation of Bosnia and Herzego)

Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML

#20646330
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24189) - you deserved it (48463)

On 05/06/2013 at 8:45pm - misc - by clumsy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML

#20644913
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45567) - you deserved it (6103)

On 05/06/2013 at 4:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64588) - you deserved it (5951)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

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FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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