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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, it was my first day on the job as a first grade teacher. One student pushed another, so I asked him to apologize. His response? "If you boss me around, I'll tell Daddy you touched me somewhere you shouldn't have." I think I'm now this kid's slave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28201) - you deserved it (2455)
On 08/29/2011 at 7:59pm - kids - by slavelaborsux (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27162) - you deserved it (3331)
On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)
Today, during our wedding, my wife tried to dodge The Kiss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42653) - you deserved it (2621)
On 08/20/2011 at 12:41am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, some cops came to my house saying that the neighbors thought the party I was having was too loud and obnoxious. It was my grandmother's 86 birthday party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21626) - you deserved it (1803)
On 08/07/2011 at 9:49pm - misc - by Paul - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my house was raided for drugs. I had to find out my father is a drug dealer. The cops then told me this wasn't their first time here, but it was the first time I was home to see it. They said it was nice to finally meet me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40518) - you deserved it (1700)
On 08/05/2011 at 4:41am - misc - by thehumanshield - United States (California)
Today, my house was raided for drugs. I had to find out my father is a drug dealer. The cops then told me this wasn't their first time here, but it was the first time I was home to see it. They said it was nice to finally meet me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40518) - you deserved it (1700)
On 08/05/2011 at 4:41am - misc - by thehumanshield - United States (California)
Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34330) - you deserved it (4137)
On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41331) - you deserved it (6110)
On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28681) - you deserved it (6424)
On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I shaved my beard off. Turns out the skin under my beard is six shades lighter than the rest of my face. I look completely ridiculous. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32154) - you deserved it (9758)
On 07/06/2011 at 12:59pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I actually resorted to checking the newspaper obituaries to see where the deceased were employed, just so I can find a job opening. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29039) - you deserved it (3531)
On 06/30/2011 at 1:44pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I was rear-ended while at a stop sign, by my driving instructor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26408) - you deserved it (2096)
On 06/23/2011 at 12:39pm - misc - by Katie - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I found out that my dad has been trying to take money out of my savings account to pay for divorce fees and a hammock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25466) - you deserved it (1606)
On 06/23/2011 at 4:17am - money - by Username - United States
Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31561) - you deserved it (6554)
On 06/11/2011 at 7:12am - kids - by julia - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7487) - you deserved it (83098)
On 06/05/2011 at 8:52pm - misc - by kringr (man) - United States (Texas)
Monday 17 June 2013
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