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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7806) - you deserved it (53682)
On 02/12/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by Alyssa - United States
Today, my brother's girlfriend broke up with him. He has been playing Whitney Houston's "I will always love you" all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23284) - you deserved it (2101)
On 02/11/2012 at 1:23am - love - by annon - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I got punched by a man for making fun of his stutter. I didn't. I stutter too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30795) - you deserved it (1579)
On 02/02/2012 at 11:00pm - misc - by Sam (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33883) - you deserved it (1911)
On 02/02/2012 at 6:32am - misc - by aliezzedine (man) - Lebanon
Today, my mom told me to clean the house up because she wants to make good impression on the cleaning lady. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22295) - you deserved it (1889)
On 01/28/2012 at 11:19am - misc - by messyvictor - United States (California)
Today, I found out the girl I've been fooling around with for two weeks has a boyfriend, who is in jail, and is a member of the Aryan Brotherhood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28284) - you deserved it (5102)
On 01/17/2012 at 6:57am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21519) - you deserved it (2916)
On 01/08/2012 at 12:42pm - misc - by bellaskyeb - United States
Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36905) - you deserved it (2324)
On 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my parents were coming to visit me at my brand new apartment. I made dinner and served them the cake my roomate had left for me in the fridge. Thirty minutes after they left, I was so baked that I couldn't think straight. I still don't know if my parents made it home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24576) - you deserved it (6910)
On 12/22/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by Cookie (woman) - South Africa
Today, my business is doing so badly that people are teaching their kids to drive in the empty parking lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24009) - you deserved it (1793)
On 12/20/2011 at 10:18pm - work - by Thomas - United States (South Carolina)
Today, thanks to some asshole with a padlock, I got trapped in porta potty for over an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24848) - you deserved it (1738)
On 12/19/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by stinkyhair (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I made a fake Facebook account for a girl, and then set my relationship status to make it look like the fake person was my girlfriend. Someone found out and hacked the fake account. My fake girlfriend just dumped me over Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7895) - you deserved it (51284)
On 12/18/2011 at 8:24pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)
Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21437) - you deserved it (10743)
On 12/16/2011 at 4:08am - kids - by Oily (man) - New Zealand (Waikato)
Today, a stoplight dropped square into the bed of my pickup truck. The police think I was attempting to steal it, and my insurance won't cover the damage to my truck. There were no witnesses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23879) - you deserved it (1377)
On 12/15/2011 at 10:16pm - misc - by metallicatime - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for a familiar reason; I apparently have night terrors that make me "Impossible to sleep in the same room with." I don't ever remember these dreams. Every other girlfriend I've had has ended up breaking things off with me for the same reason. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26818) - you deserved it (2866)
On 12/09/2011 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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