Shallow_Padentic

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Shallow_Padentic

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 21807
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Shallow_Padentic's page activity

Visits<b>Earning</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 2:55am<b>frnk</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 11:00pm<b>wolfchick1709</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:28pm<b>qwertydude1</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 12:15am<b>rolphadolph</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 10:45pm<b>axfabxdisaster</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 6:45am<b>lovelygirl88</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 3:49am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:13pm<b>mzrayray</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 9:43pm<b>jbabco</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 11:29pm<b>elibel</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 1:30pm<b>KillaGG</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 5:59pm<b>cobra2012</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 5:36pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:55pm<b>tpike1296</b> - the 04/10/2011 at 4:07pm<b>Sakura13</b> - the 01/30/2011 at 10:03am<b>SimpleSimon</b> - the 08/07/2009 at 10:48am<b>gsm</b> - the 07/31/2009 at 4:28pm

Fucked!<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 10:13pm

Shallow_Padentic's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Shallow_Padentic's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working as the shift manager at my job at a fast food restaurant. Our company policy states that all employees must be clean shaven before coming to work. I had to inform one of the employees, Kris, that they had to shave before clocking in. Kris is a woman. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 2:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was working as the shift manager at my job at a fast food restaurant. Our company policy states that all employees must be clean shaven before coming to work. I had to inform one of the employees, Kris, that they had to shave before clocking in. Kris is a woman. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 2:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, for about the fifth time, my neighbors parked blocking my driveway. After parking across the street I stuck a note on their windshield reading “Nice park job asshole“, only to find out that their nephew just passed away and everyone was gathering to go to the viewing. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 12:41pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my long hair cut in a short pixie cut. When my five year old daughter saw me she laughed and proclaimed 'You look just like a man!'. That afternoon I got a concerned call from the school. My daughter has told everyone 'mummy has gone away, I now have two daddies!' FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 12:14pm / United Kingdom (Edinburgh) / Kids

Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. 5 seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the happy sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 6:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing in a basketball game and blocked this kid's shot. I was really pumped up about it until I realized the kid had cerebral palsy and the coach put him on the team because he really wanted to be on at least one team in his life. FML

by jalapenos99 / 04/01/2009 at 8:36pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, for April fools I decided to set off the smoke detectors in my friend's apartment while he was sleeping and saran wrap the outside of his bedroom doorway so he would smack into it. Instead, he jumped out the window and broke his leg. FML

by nic / 04/01/2009 at 4:06pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, bouncing at a local bar. I I.D.'d a girl with a group of people. I told her that next time she used a fake I.D., she at least should get one with a picture that looked like her. She started crying and ran off. A guy told me that she had been in a car wreck, and had been badly disfigured. FML

by tsardaukar / 04/01/2009 at 12:51pm / United States (Maine) / Work

Today, I got up early to prank my family. I put a bucket of ice water on top of a door frame so whoever walked through would get an icy surprise. After I was done, I went back to bed. I woke up groggy and disoriented like always and walked right through the doorway I had rigged. FML

by blackvogue / 04/01/2009 at 6:42am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work the police were looking over video footage of an incident earlier in the day where a car had slammed hard into another one in the carpark. My manager came into the kitchen and asked if I wanted to come see it to for a laugh. The car that got hit was mine. FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2009 at 6:07am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I ran to a public bathroom because of explosive diarrhea. In the middle of it, I noticed there was no more toilet paper nor paper towels remaining. The smallest bill in my wallet was a 5. I had to pay 10 dollars to wipe my own butt. FML

by highleyj / 04/01/2009 at 4:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend told me how I am too occupied with work for our relationship. Before we had sex I told my friend to call me in ten minutes so I can pretend its my boss and I would throw the phone away to impress her. He called me in ten minutes, but I only lasted five. FML

by Alex / 03/31/2009 at 12:41am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was working out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML

by Mark / 03/30/2009 at 3:06am / United States / Love

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 years old to run to the store. She didnt want to but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

by badmom / 03/27/2009 at 2:42pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to log in to my computer on a projector in front of business associates at my dad's architecture firm. I typed in my username and apparently didn't hit the tab key hard enough, so I typed my password in the username box. The entire firm now knows my password is "tits123". FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work