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Screwie

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Screwie

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4197
  • Number of comments : 116
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Screwie : Pet me, I'll take you home.

Screwie's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 6:47am<b>JacobRSE</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 7:27am<b>jshakd642</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 4:05pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 1:40pm<b>soccergirl2016</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 11:10pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 3:55pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 10:12am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 10:47am<b>sisas</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 6:15pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 1:54pm<b>ch0sn</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 10:44pm<b>zoepie</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 4:35am<b>usagi_t</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 2:56am<b>intothestars_</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 7:10pm<b>slayer447</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 2:44pm<b>goalie01</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 3:43am<b>nesteremily</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 5:10am<b>ilcap</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 9:42pm

Screwie's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Screwie's badges

Screwie's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML

#19921973
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22318) - you deserved it (8910)

On 07/11/2012 at 1:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

#19903364
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32106) - you deserved it (3816)

On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad was driving me home and was angrily explaining how my boyfriend was a bad influence and that he was hanging out with the wrong crowd. After finally convincing him to give him another chance, we stopped at a traffic light just in time to see my boyfriend being chased by police. FML

#19887405
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11614) - you deserved it (34693)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:20pm - love - by Jenna (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I discovered my cat's favorite hobby: sitting butthole-first on my favorite makeup brush. FML

#19870178
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21945) - you deserved it (2926)

On 06/30/2012 at 4:10am - misc - by audreyav - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

#19861407
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6272) - you deserved it (81088)

On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)

Today, I woke up to a guy outside my house, who wanted to give me flowers and take me out on a date. Aside from it all being pretty fucking creepy anyway, the guy is my not quite right in the head second cousin, who's apparently now head-over-heels in love with me. FML

#19778699
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26907) - you deserved it (2137)

On 06/12/2012 at 8:24pm - love - by Az (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I proudly told my elitist dad that I now have a beautiful girlfriend. He didn't believe me, so I showed him her Facebook. He demanded that I stop seeing her, saying that the duck-facing in her avatar was the hallmark of "a lower form of being" who would only ever shame our family. FML

#19778453
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11704) - you deserved it (27878)

On 06/12/2012 at 7:39pm - love - by idontgetit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I volunteered at a soup kitchen. During the rounds, a grisly but nice young fellow told me that I had beautiful eyes. I was quite touched; that is until he leaned in and added, "Can I have them for my collection?" FML

#19777133
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26469) - you deserved it (1859)

On 06/12/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I put the little boy I nanny for in time-out. In retaliation he blasted an air horn in my face. I can only hear out of one ear now. FML

#19769607
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21881) - you deserved it (2766)

On 06/11/2012 at 7:18am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after a long night of partying, I fell asleep, while my bride was delivering her vows. FML

#19761767
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7130) - you deserved it (55285)

On 06/09/2012 at 7:04pm - love - by UnluckyGroom (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, at the beach, my boyfriend picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I felt my bikini top come undone in the process. I panicked and pulled down on his shorts. We were fined for indecent exposure. FML

#19757535
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21749) - you deserved it (9043)

On 06/08/2012 at 10:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27279) - you deserved it (2852)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML

#19730259
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32724) - you deserved it (3214)

On 06/04/2012 at 12:34am - misc - by whattheheck - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I had so much to do, I didn't know where to start. So I didn't. FML

#19714828
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13081) - you deserved it (43329)

On 06/01/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Austria (Wien)



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