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Offline (the 04/04/2015 at 3:09pm) | Search for a member
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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I learned that instead of training my cat, she has been training me. She now refuses to drink anything but running tap water, and yowls loudly early in the morning at my bedroom door to be fed. FML
Today, my boyfriend ended our relationship. He called me from his mobile phone, claimed to be a trauma surgeon, and told me with a bad German accent that my "boyfriend" had been in a fatal car crash earlier in the day. What the hell is wrong with this idiot? FML
Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML
Today, I brought my 90-year-old grandfather into school for a project that required to bring in "a first-hand account" of the Great Depression. He started off by telling the class how in his day, they "threw rocks at black people." FML
Monday 5 October 2015