Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Sakaea

Offline (the 11/05/2014 at 4:03am) | Search for a member

Sakaea

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 September 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1968
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Sakaea : I love Final Fantasy and the Wheel of Time, and I love reading FML!

Sakaea's page activity

Visits<b>Alex191992</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 3:24pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 10:44am<b>Mathis92987</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 1:31am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 3:52pm<b>neo08061972</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 8:11pm<b>jtrizzle93</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 10:25am<b>Ins0mau</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 6:55pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 6:23pm<b>SMHsohard</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 3:54pm<b>mrsVoltzie57</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 11:03am<b>PunsY0</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 12:39am<b>Leise</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 8:48am<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 5:44pm<b>tckma</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 5:04pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 01/19/2013 at 11:29am<b>twinklesthecat</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 3:28pm<b>mbpoland</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 9:37pm<b>Pitbull305</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 7:06pm

Sakaea's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of Sakaea's badges

Sakaea's favorite FMLs

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML

#21093670
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38442) - you deserved it (10070)

On 03/22/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by campus pussy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I threw an eraser at my brother to get his attention because he couldn't hear me over his music. Being in a bad mood, he thought I was trying to aggravate his bad mood and responded by throwing a small desk cactus back. FML

#21071018
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36744) - you deserved it (13021)

On 02/25/2014 at 4:31am - misc - by ThatGuyWithFMLs (man) - Japan (Osaka)

Today, I told my husband how frisky I was feeling, and asked him what he was going to do about it. He reached into our fruit bowl, tossed me a banana and told me to work it out, then returned to his video game. FML

#21061692
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52571) - you deserved it (7844)

On 02/15/2014 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

#21059009
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31609) - you deserved it (47736)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41467) - you deserved it (12510)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55037) - you deserved it (27646)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, my mom is convinced that my cat is the reincarnation of Vincent van Gogh. Why? He sleeps under my sunflowers and is a ginger tabby cat. FML

#20854246
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34317) - you deserved it (2841)

On 08/25/2013 at 9:16pm - animals - by KatVanGogh (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my 7-year-old son proudly announced that he had laid an egg during the night. I checked. He'd simply shat the bed. FML

#20835170
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48013) - you deserved it (3795) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/13/2013 at 4:49am - kids - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

#20817265
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56840) - you deserved it (5524)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by um... what the fuck, miss? (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my family and I went to feed carrots to the giraffes at the zoo. After I finished my first cup of carrots, I turned back to get some more. Suddenly, I was jerked back and a chunk of my hair was ripped out. The giraffe mistook the orange barrette in my hair for a carrot. FML

#20809312
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44574) - you deserved it (9619)

On 07/29/2013 at 4:19am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband was chased out of a bar after he was seen slipping something into a woman's drink. I was the woman, the 'something' was aspirin, and that's the last time we ever try to role-play. FML

#20798724
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49315) - you deserved it (27557)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: