About SadderGirl01 : Just a girl trying to find her place in this world....
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27621) - you deserved it (2158)
On 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm - love - by Shelly P. (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, an intoxicated homeless man tried to chase me out of a McDonald's because he thought I was President Obama. I'm a 26-year-old white woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23894) - you deserved it (1796)
On 01/23/2012 at 7:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21665) - you deserved it (2776)
On 01/13/2012 at 5:47am - intimacy - by doctorsandnurses (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27164) - you deserved it (4426)
On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, I decided to write a romantic email to my boyfriend describing how much I love and miss him. An hour later, I got an email back saying, "I think we need to discuss this." It seems I sent it to my teacher by mistake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23172) - you deserved it (10254)
On 01/01/2012 at 2:02pm - love - by mjbx (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)
Today, while watching Rio, I got a boner when Blu and Jewel kissed. This is almost as pathetic as getting a boner a few days ago while watching Homer and Marge kiss on The Simpsons. I think I'm way past the point of ever getting laid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24894) - you deserved it (7344)
On 01/01/2012 at 1:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while watching Rio, I got a boner when Blu and Jewel kissed. This is almost as pathetic as getting a boner a few days ago while watching Homer and Marge kiss on The Simpsons. I think I'm way past the point of ever getting laid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24894) - you deserved it (7344)
On 01/01/2012 at 1:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40341) - you deserved it (2820)
On 01/01/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to put his penis in a hole in our bedroom wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25765) - you deserved it (4288)
On 12/25/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for a while. I shaved my legs and armpits and wore a short dress. It wasn't until I got to the meeting that I noticed I only shaved one of my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23671) - you deserved it (11591)
On 12/23/2011 at 10:22pm - love - by bigmistake - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11506) - you deserved it (26287)
On 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia
Today, my parents were coming to visit me at my brand new apartment. I made dinner and served them the cake my roomate had left for me in the fridge. Thirty minutes after they left, I was so baked that I couldn't think straight. I still don't know if my parents made it home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25182) - you deserved it (6979)
On 12/22/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by Cookie (woman) - South Africa
Today, I was wanking and starting thinking about why the Simpsons are yellow, and how that came to be. I haven't been laid in 4 years and my ADD is so crippling that I can't jack off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23606) - you deserved it (4155)
On 12/21/2011 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I heard my alarm go off, dragged myself out of bed, had breakfast and got ready for work. As I was heading out the door I checked the time again. It was 1:41 AM. Apparently my alarm never actually went off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25199) - you deserved it (4005)
On 12/15/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by 2285morgan - United States
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17177) - you deserved it (20842)
On 12/14/2011 at 6:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Monday 17 June 2013
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