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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 January 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 30501
  • Number of comments : 76
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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SadIife's page activity

Visits<b>WJM505</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 11:15pm<b>Ang3lofd3ath167</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 2:00am<b>clockz</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 1:03pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:20am<b>Global_User</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 3:19pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 12:21pm<b>PleadingInsanity</b> - the 08/19/2012 at 12:48am<b>outoftown</b> - the 08/15/2012 at 2:15am<b>acetl87</b> - the 06/18/2012 at 12:51am<b>Cute</b> - the 05/07/2012 at 8:32pm

SadIife's FML badges


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SadIife's favorite FMLs

Today, someone told me that my initials really fit my personality. I took it as a strange compliment, until I realized my initials spell "ew". FML

by ew / 08/11/2013 at 9:09am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2013 at 6:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2013 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 4:03am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friends thought it would be fun to change my dad's name on my phone to my girlfriend's name. Guess who got an erotic text message when standing next to me while in the line to buy groceries. FML

by AnnoyedByFriends / 08/08/2013 at 12:43am / Miscellaneous

Today, my mum picked up a bunch of tissues that were scattered around my room. She examined them, then asked me to stop wasting her potential grandchildren. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2013 at 6:24pm / Egypt / Intimacy

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

by hardee fucking har yourself, sir / 08/07/2013 at 6:00pm / United Kingdom (Stockport) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my mum why she never had any children after me. She scoffed and asked if I've looked in a mirror lately. FML

by noiguessitsbroken :( / 08/07/2013 at 8:24am / Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis) / Miscellaneous

Today, during an otherwise promising job interview, I was asked how much I thought was too much for a "good hit of blow". I must have stayed speechless for too long, because the guy's next words were, "Yeah, you're not cut out for this." I'm shocked and baffled too. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2013 at 6:49am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

by Blood on my hands / 08/07/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Animals

Today, I asked my surgeon if I would be having a general or local anesthetic at my upcoming operation. He replied, "General, of course! It's gonna be a slaughterhouse in there!" FML

by pong / 08/06/2013 at 5:59pm / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Health

Today, my daughter, who was born in late 2000, mentioned how amazing it is that she'll be alive during the year 3000. I asked her exactly how old she thinks she'll be by then. She said, "Thirty, duh." I've screwed up as a parent, so very badly. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2013 at 11:19am / United States (Arkansas) / Kids

Today, I went to my boss's dinner party. My sister, who also works with me, sat across from me at the table. I felt her kick me so I kicked her back. Then I heard something start crying. It was the boss's baby crawling under the table. FML

by offuckingcourse / 08/06/2013 at 1:07am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

by zackeryburch / 08/03/2013 at 9:01am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous