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Today, I was teaching a swimming lesson to 6-7 year old boys and girls. I recently broke up with my boyfriend so I haven't been taking care of my bikini line. While I was demonstrating how to do a whip-kick out of the water one of the boys said, "You have a beard coming out of your bathing suit!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (34247) - you deserved it (52953)
On 03/14/2009 at 10:27pm - kids - by superfkd (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was teaching a swimming lesson to 6-7 year old boys and girls. I recently broke up with my boyfriend so I haven't been taking care of my bikini line. While I was demonstrating how to do a whip-kick out of the water one of the boys said, "You have a beard coming out of your bathing suit!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (34247) - you deserved it (52953)
On 03/14/2009 at 10:27pm - kids - by superfkd (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (209209) - you deserved it (35407)
On 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by sucks - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have our first "Cybering" experience. I downloaded Skype per his instructions, and hooked up my cam. Just as everything started getting hot and heavy, I farted. He stopped and frowned. I had no idea it was a video AND voice program. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15854) - you deserved it (71852)
On 03/11/2009 at 2:35pm - intimacy - by awkwardgayboi (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my roommate got mad at me for putting away the tampons that were sitting on her desk. She rebelled by hanging hundreds of tampons dyed red from every surface in our dorm room. I discovered this while giving my mom her first tour of the place. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48385) - you deserved it (4110)
On 03/11/2009 at 9:38am - misc - by powsser (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went on my porch for a late night cigarette. When I opened the door and took one step inside, all I remember is a big thud. I woke up 5 minutes later with my Father over top of me saying "nice right hook, huh?" Then he chuckled. He thought I was a burgler and he knocked me out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46204) - you deserved it (7144)
On 03/11/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Noname - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my brother's new girlfriend, who is blind, asked to feel my face so she could tell what I look like. She said i was "unique". A blind chick just told me I was ugly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53034) - you deserved it (3925)
On 03/11/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by GreenScar (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boss called me into his office. I thought I was getting promoted because my sales had been really high lately. My boss shut his door behind me and asked me if I could comb his hair with a lice comb to get rid of his lice. I had to do it to keep my job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58169) - you deserved it (2025)
On 03/10/2009 at 9:02am - misc - by Janet - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was giving a friend a neck rub, when she started to breathe heavily. So I figured she was getting into it, so I started kissing her neck, she then turns around and says "Tell my room mate I'm having an asthma attack." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28565) - you deserved it (47003)
On 03/10/2009 at 5:56am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was at a dance. I was griding with this guy when I felt something move in his pants. I stood up and stepped away. He replied with "Don't flatter yourself, it was my phone". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16963) - you deserved it (41514)
On 03/09/2009 at 8:26pm - misc - by Joe (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (462178) - you deserved it (574117)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was with my family at a buffet getting dessert. As I had my chocolate cake in hand, I grabbed an extra slice of cheesecake for my mom because I knew she would like a slice. Upon returning to my table, a couple walking behind me commented, "See, that's why Americans are so obese." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40265) - you deserved it (7152)
On 03/09/2009 at 4:25am - misc - by McChunky =( - United States (California)
Today, I was so drunk that my friends put me to bed during a party. Later I find out that while I was passed out two of my friends came in and had sex while I was in the same bed. They tried to use me as a prop. Now my friends call me the love wedge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59023) - you deserved it (18185)
On 03/08/2009 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by lovewedge (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was walking down the street when I passed a construction site. All of the workers started making a fuss and whistling, etc. Naturally, I got very flustered. I stood still for a second and faced them. One yelled for me to move because I was in the way of a girl at a stop light. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52504) - you deserved it (10009)
On 03/08/2009 at 7:40pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (83412) - you deserved it (15544)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Cody (man) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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