About RogueWarrior869 : Not much to say. I love writing and gaming.
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The Thumb returns
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I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
RogueWarrior869's favorite FMLs
Today, after five different interviews, I got an offer for a great job. I was excited to fill out paperwork and get the ball rolling, until they called and said that I didn't pass the criminal background check. I get off probation in less than a week. FML
by prisonbitch / 02/18/2010 at 12:41pm / United States / Work
Today, I was pulling a car out of the shop where I work, when I tried to go over a small snow bank to park it. What I didn't realize was the snow had turned into solid ice, and it broke the front bumper cover. It's going to cost $1000 to fix it and I also had to call the owner. FML
by sacredsilence29 / 02/16/2010 at 4:16pm / United States (Virginia) / Work
Today, it was my turn to take out the trash. While walking to the dumpster, I slip and fall. It doesn't really hurt, so I get up and go to the dumpster, but the top is frozen stuck. It won't budge. Then I really pull with a lot of force, and the lid swings open and busts my nose. FML
by lolographic24 / 02/13/2010 at 8:44am / Norway (Oslo) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/12/2010 at 2:44am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by extants / 02/11/2010 at 3:13pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Money
Today, I was in class and noticed that it smelled strongly of cat urine. I smelled my shoulder and realized that my cat had peed on my sweater. I had six hours of classes left, and the smell had permeated my shirt. FML
by snickerdoodles / 02/10/2010 at 4:19pm / United States (Oregon) / Animals
by anonymous / 02/10/2010 at 3:59pm / United States / Health
Today, I was sitting on the wooden edge of my coffee table watching my sister's boyfriend play Halo 2, when I leaned back to stretch and shattered the center pane of glass in the table. I now have a large gash in my ass. FML
by Kaganate / 02/08/2010 at 7:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was going out to my car with my sister's birthday present. I slipped on some ice and the present fell to the ground. I spent an hour wrapping it. I could hear the present break. I had gotten her $200 wine glasses. I then had to run to the nearest store and get her a CD instead. FML
by GymnasticsQueen / 02/07/2010 at 7:35pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother told me that the carbon-monoxide alarm went off last night, but since she didn't smell any gas, she decided to just remove the batteries and go back to bed. I had to explain to her that you can't smell carbon monoxide, and that we could have died in our sleep. FML
by Kelso / 02/06/2010 at 1:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by fuckmylife / 02/02/2010 at 3:30pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids
by Chris / 02/02/2010 at 12:40am / Transportation
Today, I heard the sound of footsteps in the basement. Thinking it was burglars I grabbed a baseball bat and hurried down the stairs. I then tripped on the stairs, fell down them and smacked my head on the bat. The sound of footsteps I heard? It was my cat playing in some cardboard boxes. FML
by dontbadouche / 02/01/2010 at 8:45am / Senegal / Animals
Today, I was in the car with my cousin and we saw a family of three. They where all really fat and the lady was holding 2 boxes of pizza. I decided to roll down the window and scream "fatasses" as loud as I could while my cousin drove off. They were going to the same house we were. FML
by lauris1306 / 01/31/2010 at 2:03am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Obsessed / 01/30/2010 at 3:54pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- Today, after struggling with Erectile dysfunction I finally got an erection while my wife was home,… Today, after months of planning & asking her father permission, I proposed to my girlfriend of five… Last night I got really drunk and professed my love to the guy I've been hooking up with here and…