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Today, I was eating at a Mexican restaurant with my sister. I was happily biting into a burrito, when I saw a man in his car in the restaurant parking lot, staring at us and jacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28162) - you deserved it (2610)
On 11/09/2010 at 2:51am - intimacy - by secretdoll (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49161) - you deserved it (9961)
On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, my friend and I dressed up as dice for Halloween. The rest of the night consisted of us, harassed by drunks asking, 'Can we roll you around?' and constantly being shaken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7365) - you deserved it (19912)
On 10/30/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Japan (Tokyo)
Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9293) - you deserved it (18159)
On 08/29/2010 at 12:54am - animals - by Hobbsie - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I spent 100 dollars on lingerie. I put it on, walk out to the living room, and tell my boyfriend to follow me into the bedroom. He says no, and then pretends to fall asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24948) - you deserved it (4280)
On 07/24/2010 at 7:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous90 (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (88151) - you deserved it (9129)
On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)
Today, I was rushed to the hospital because I was crying so hard I couldn't breathe. Why was I crying? My favorite anime character died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12379) - you deserved it (60224)
On 01/30/2010 at 3:54pm - misc - by Obsessed (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26343) - you deserved it (5759)
On 01/28/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by Crap (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20506) - you deserved it (3647)
On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (123978) - you deserved it (4825)
On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after making out with this guy, our tongue piercings got stuck together. After about five minutes of trying to unlock them, I accidentally vomited a little in his mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30279) - you deserved it (29535)
On 09/19/2009 at 1:22am - love - by Pierceew (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "Orgasm face." And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61194) - you deserved it (3343)
On 09/19/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was driving through a neighborhood and saw a "slow down, children" sign. I was nice and slowed down as I passed a couple little kids with their parents outside watching them. I guess I was going too slow because one of the fathers started chasing me down the street calling me a pedophile. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34951) - you deserved it (3306)
On 09/18/2009 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (92978) - you deserved it (6034)
On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States
Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (78464) - you deserved it (18449)
On 08/06/2009 at 7:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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