About Rainbow_dumpster : I'm an ordinary girl who life secretly sucks
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5435) - you deserved it (48243)
On 08/16/2011 at 6:17am - animals - by NaniNarcotic - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was supposed to catch a ride with a friend and go to Warped Tour with her. She called at the last minute to say she was sick, so I told her we didn't have to go. I just got a text saying she just got pictures and autographs with the band I especially wanted to see. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28106) - you deserved it (2257)
On 08/11/2011 at 4:56pm - misc - by brittgreen (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and everyone believes I'm a swinger. Because of this, no girl wants to go out with me, in case they become just another notch under my belt. The truth is, I'm still a virgin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8187) - you deserved it (66945)
On 07/23/2011 at 7:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a window, the hornets will go after the source of the stream. It can also cause you to fall through your friend's second story window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7374) - you deserved it (49814)
On 07/19/2011 at 12:41pm - misc - by freakfreak12345 - United States (Maine)
Today, my dad told my little brother that Tokyo is in China. This is the same guy that yells at me every time I get a "B" on a report card. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23773) - you deserved it (1356)
On 07/14/2011 at 1:09am - misc - by j1hill33 - United States (Georgia)
Today, my mom took me to a counselor because of my addiction to watermelon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25470) - you deserved it (3978)
On 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my boss fired me for dating a co-worker. There's no policy forbidding it; he just thought it was unfair that I could get with the "hottest girl who works here" but he can't. I live in an at-will employment state. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22840) - you deserved it (2092)
On 07/03/2011 at 12:21pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9984) - you deserved it (152211)
On 06/16/2011 at 2:20am - intimacy - by crushed dreams - United States
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on for the first time. Just as I was about to climax, I spotted my greatest fear, a big wasp, only a few inches away from me. I shuddered and made a very unmanly orgasm wail. She now refuses to have sex because she says I "turned her off forever". FML
I agree, your life sucks (31889) - you deserved it (8157)
On 06/07/2011 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Punk (man) - United States
Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7467) - you deserved it (82709)
On 06/05/2011 at 8:52pm - misc - by kringr (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56907) - you deserved it (2686)
On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I wore a Super Mario Brothers T-shirt to school that showed a picture of Mario with a mushroom above his head. I got suspended for "referencing illegal drugs". FML
I agree, your life sucks (38127) - you deserved it (4192)
On 05/11/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Sola -
Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39216) - you deserved it (4362)
On 04/28/2011 at 11:53am - animals - by Cecilly2010 -
Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24268) - you deserved it (31169)
On 04/28/2011 at 7:07am - kids - by oldmama728 -
Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29077) - you deserved it (2841)
On 04/28/2011 at 6:28am - misc - by spartanson -
Monday 20 May 2013
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