RabenSchwartz

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RabenSchwartz

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1571
  • Number of comments : 61
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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RabenSchwartz's page activity

Visits<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 11:27pm<b>Subcontinent</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 2:44pm<b>stereofeathers</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 11:54pm<b>captain_nessness</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 4:49am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 12:49pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 4:43pm<b>Liamj774</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 2:52pm<b>Im_a_Believer</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 5:01pm<b>music8484</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 1:33pm<b>vampirefairy_07</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 1:20am<b>muffinkitty</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 1:00am<b>ashesnk95</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 1:59pm<b>Psapfa</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 9:59am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 9:58am<b>CloudEnvy</b> - the 09/08/2010 at 3:29pm<b>manicrose</b> - the 04/25/2010 at 2:40pm<b>TheTragicReturn</b> - the 01/26/2010 at 5:29pm<b>repyourcliche</b> - the 01/26/2010 at 11:28am

RabenSchwartz's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

RabenSchwartz's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that when you buy ropes, duct tapes, a shovel, razor blades, a fire poker, and a carton of cigs, the police can turn up and search your house for 'prisoners'. Those items were actually coincidental. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2011 at 9:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a window, the hornets will go after the source of the stream. It can also cause you to fall through your friend's second story window. FML

by freakfreak12345 / 07/19/2011 at 12:41pm / United States (Maine) / Animals

Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML

by Ignored / 07/13/2011 at 2:47am / United States (Texas) / Geek

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

by whyme102008 / 07/13/2011 at 2:32am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 1:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I got a phone call from a friend, who lives in the same neighbourhood as me, wondering if it was my father she saw walking a dog by her house, wearing only his boxers. It was. FML

by Anonymous / 12/07/2010 at 5:35am / Norway (Ostfold) / Animals

Today, I walked outside to see my friend frantically waving and running at me, yelling something I couldn't understand. I smiled and started to jog over to him until I realized he was screaming "RUN!!!" We spent the next 10 minutes running from his neighbor's 5 vicious chihuahuas. FML

by chi-huaHUA / 12/04/2010 at 2:08am / United States / Animals

Today, my gynecologist was having trouble with my exam due to me being "too tight." I'm 24. After the explanation of having been pretty inactive in over a year, she exclaimed, "Damn, girl, we really need to find you a boyfriend!" Yeah, tell me about it. FML

by miss cranky pants / 10/30/2010 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2010 at 4:31am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I proudly gave my grandma a picture I had drawn for her. She didn't seem thrilled with it, and afterwards the rest of my family seemed upset. Nobody could fathom why I drew grandma a picture of a graveyard for her 85th birthday. It was suppose to be a bridge. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 12:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I put my 4 year old daughter in the car seat, she dropped her crayon. She then paused and matter-of-factly said, "Mommy, I don't say 'f***' anymore when I drop things." FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2010 at 8:25pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, I woke up to a broken window and 3 guys sitting in my living room watching TV. FML

by anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 11:06pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I attended a musical. A new song was played, and I thought I'd heard it before because it sounded strangely familiar. I sang along quietly as the song progressed, positive I knew it. Anticipating the next chorus, I belted out the lyrics with all my heart. It was instrumental. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 6:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the reason my best friend is not allowed over anymore is because he hits on my mom and writes her love letters. FML

by Bestfrienduncool / 09/30/2010 at 1:11am / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the reason my best friend is not allowed over anymore is because he hits on my mom and writes her love letters. FML

by Bestfrienduncool / 09/30/2010 at 1:11am / Miscellaneous