About RDragonzx : Commonly known as RDragonzx on almost everything web related, it has been my alias for a good few years now, so if you see it you have got me.
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RDragonzx's favorite FMLs
Today, I laughed about a fold in my girlfriend's jeans that felt like she had a tiny boner. She started crying. Turns out she has a slight deformity. Oops. Explains why we've been taking it so slow. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2015 at 4:39am / Australia / Love
by Anonymous / 10/13/2015 at 3:35am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my best friend told me how his batshit insane girlfriend keeps questioning his sexuality and thinks we're screwing behind her back. He's so desperate for a relationship that he's decided to stop hanging out with me. Goodbye 7 years of friendship. FML
by Anonymous / 10/12/2015 at 10:29am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Miscellaneous
Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbor's attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML
by Anonymous / 10/11/2015 at 11:34am / United States (Kentucky) / Transportation
Today, while looking through my son's browser history, I found a Google search for "stop looking in my history u nosey cunt". I swore last week that I don't invade his privacy, so I can't even punish him for the bad language without looking like a lying bastard. FML
by Hank-T4 / 10/11/2015 at 7:45am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids
Today, I realized that my two year old likes to help with the groceries. And by help I mean hide a bag of chicken. It's been two weeks since I went grocery shopping and I still can't find it, but it smells like something died in my house. FML
Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML
by Anonymous / 10/09/2015 at 2:02pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out my son told his teachers that I make his brother Tom sleep on the floor, make him stay out of the house for long periods of time, and don't let him use the toilet. Tom is actually our cat. FML
by Bad Mother / 10/08/2015 at 7:53am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Animals
Today, I'm staying at my grandparents' house. I went upstairs to grab my sketchbook to show off to my grandma. My grandpa is half-deaf, which I guess explains how he didn't hear me. I heard him though, jerking off and muttering the most disgusting sexual things about "Tara." I'm Tara. FML
by T-Bear / 10/07/2015 at 11:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I got dragged into playing doubles tennis. It was me and my wife against her parents. I wound up hitting the ball too hard. My mother-in-law, who has the reaction times of a comatose turtle, got nailed. Everyone's convinced I did it on purpose because of our mutual hatred of each other. FML
by Anonymous / 10/04/2015 at 10:20am / United States (Florida) / Health
Today, at the swimming pool, I thought it'd be funny to sneak up on my 5-year-old daughter underwater and surprise her. I grabbed her by the sides, and she shrieked. A moment later, a brown cloud erupted from her swimsuit. Cue screaming and a mass panic from the other kids. FML
by Anonymous / 10/03/2015 at 3:00am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
Today, my pain-in-the-ass co-worker is finally leaving. Unfortunately, I was chosen to do the bulk of her job. She has given me no training and on her last day, just smirked at me on her way out and say, "Enjoy doing my job too, fucker". I don't get paid enough for this. FML
by scoobses / 10/01/2015 at 8:45pm / United States / Work
Today, my mother felt the need to remind me not to fall in love with a fictional character. After laughing and reassuring her that I knew the difference between fiction and reality, she replied, "You know, honey, sometimes I'm not so sure." FML
by DontBeRude / 09/28/2015 at 12:05am / United States (California) / Love
by DSCC / 09/27/2015 at 11:07pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
by erphy21 / 09/26/2015 at 4:44pm / United States (California) / Intimacy