Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

RDragonzx

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

RDragonzx

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Adelaide, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 May 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3805
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About RDragonzx : Commonly known as RDragonzx on almost everything web related, it has been my alias for a good few years now, so if you see it you have got me.

RDragonzx's page activity

Visits<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 9:04pm<b>Agnesia</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:51am<b>acciofrenchhorn</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:38am<b>nialls_princess1</b> - the 03/20/2013 at 6:48pm<b>satanisthesavior</b> - the 03/28/2012 at 5:04am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:15pm

RDragonzx's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of RDragonzx's badges

RDragonzx's favorite FMLs

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37636) - you deserved it (10615)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my co-workers talking about how they don't need flu shots because everyone else gets them. These people are in the medical industry. FML

#21286250
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31136) - you deserved it (2931)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40am - work - by Silbax1 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

#21280696
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35810) - you deserved it (3586)

On 10/18/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML

#21279866
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39022) - you deserved it (5518)

On 10/17/2014 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by gettinghotinhere - United States (California)

Today, while out for dinner with my parents, a woman, approximately the same age as my mother, repeatedly propositioned me for sex during the course of my meal. After declining firmly several times, she only stopped after my mother convinced her I was gay. FML

#21279658
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36651) - you deserved it (3064)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML

#21278356
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25846) - you deserved it (52080)

On 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I told my boyfriend about how I was a test tube baby. He looked at me with confusion before asking, "But if scientists made you, surely you'd be really attractive and talented and stuff?" FML

#21272259
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38431) - you deserved it (3770)

On 10/06/2014 at 7:47pm - misc - by thanks babe - United Kingdom (Shropshire)

Today, my mother is so overdramatic that her response to finding out I lost a friend's book was that I should fake my own death rather than fess up. FML

#21265006
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30288) - you deserved it (2769)

On 09/25/2014 at 7:19am - misc - by hylianprincess (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39748) - you deserved it (3580)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, my husband asked our tax professional if we could file my profession as "Expert Dream Murderer." I'm a guidance counselor. FML

#21251173
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34238) - you deserved it (4529)

On 09/03/2014 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what he calls a "Jesus beard" and gone out asking for donations and claiming to be Jesus Christ. I've been trying and failing to get a job for 2 years, and he's already raking in cash from gullible idiots. FML

#21247834
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36285) - you deserved it (3209)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40000) - you deserved it (7273)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48482) - you deserved it (8857)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: