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R3DN3CKTBRIZZ7's favorite FMLs
by sad / 10/25/2011 at 6:15am / Reserved / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/25/2011 at 1:58am / United States / Transportation
Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML
by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by soldiergirl / 10/24/2011 at 8:13pm / United States / Love
by lonely / 10/24/2011 at 10:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML
by ShitHappens / 10/24/2011 at 1:04am / United States / Love
Today, after my son graduated from nursing school which I, as a single parent, paid for with blood, sweat, and tears, during his grad party he was asked what his next step was. His response was, "Eh, I kinda realized I hate nursing." FML
by Anonymous / 10/24/2011 at 12:22am / United States / Kids
Today, I went to the hospital with a broken hand. They gave me a cast and some prescription pain medication. The only problem is that the bottle of medication is child-proof, I live alone and I can't open it with one hand. FML
by charlotte9338 / 10/23/2011 at 7:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by Mrs. Terrified / 10/23/2011 at 7:08pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
by canucks_chick / 10/23/2011 at 1:45am / Canada / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/23/2011 at 1:30am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home from work to my 3 year old daughter sniffing the rug in the living room. When I asked her what she was doing she said "Daddy smell this." So I went, got on my knees and bent down to smell it and she pushed my face in the dog crap smeared in the rug. FML
by me / 10/22/2011 at 10:06pm / United States (Maine) / Kids
Today, I'm hiding in my own house, because my crazy neighbor wants to "play." Yesterday when I agreed, she made me spend the whole day with her, then burst into tears when I had to leave. She's been waiting outside for over two hours. FML
by pretty_coin / 10/22/2011 at 9:02pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was giving a PowerPoint presentation in class. When I put my flash drive into the computer, my folder opened up and a nude picture of myself popped right up on a 110 inch projector screen for all 35 students to see. This is a 16 week course. FML
by jaymash / 10/22/2011 at 9:25am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML
by Anonymous / 10/22/2011 at 2:10am / United States (Texas) / Love
- Today, I woke up from a dream in which I was making passionate love with a beautiful woman. The bad… Today, while changing my 10 week old baby's nappy and everything was going fine as usual. Just as I… Today, for the second time, my girlfriend completely forgot that we split the rent on our apartment…
- Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the… Today, during a family dinner with my grandparents, I showed them some pictures. One was a picture…