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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14123) - you deserved it (46408)
On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17516) - you deserved it (44317)
On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, while waiting for a job interview, a woman sat down next to me and asked if I was here for the job too. Thinking she was also an applicant, I tried to demoralise her, and said the job was going to be a complete joke. With that, she stood up and said, "Do you still want to go into my office?" She was the interviewer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5461) - you deserved it (51713)
On 02/03/2011 at 1:53pm - work - by parker1993 (man) - United States
Today, I wrote a mental note: don't tell a couple of nuns that you used black magic to fix their computer. Then don't tell the story to your boss just as the nuns walk back in again. Then don't say "speak of the devil" to them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7575) - you deserved it (23868)
On 01/20/2011 at 5:55am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my boss was being a total asshole. While in the bathroom, he turned his back on me, so I gave him the finger, mouthed obscenities, and pantomimed stabbing him with a knife. He was looking in the mirror and saw everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6905) - you deserved it (50781)
On 11/23/2010 at 8:41am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, while driving I made a fake phone call with my fake boyfriend, making him sound amazing to my friends who were in the car with me. Until the red and blue flashing lights pulled up behind us. My fake boyfriend cost me $160 in real fines. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4615) - you deserved it (43159)
On 08/07/2010 at 7:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, someone gave me 13 dollar bills. I rejected one because I'm very superstitious about the unlucky 13. Later, I waited half an hour in the car for someone to bring me exactly 1 dollar because I did not have enough for the parking fee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5137) - you deserved it (44337)
On 07/24/2010 at 5:56pm - money - by onedollar (man) - Venezuela (Distrito Federal)
Today, I found out the guy I've been dating is heavily into a mystical card game and spends all of his money going to "Magic" card conventions across the country. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8434) - you deserved it (16740)
On 02/12/2010 at 12:03am - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was rushed to the hospital because I was crying so hard I couldn't breathe. Why was I crying? My favorite anime character died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12418) - you deserved it (60350)
On 01/30/2010 at 3:54pm - misc - by Obsessed (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went for a ride with my son. I noticed he didn't have his seat belt on. To teach him a lesson, I drove very slowly and hit the brakes really hard. The impact was greater than I thought, so my son hit his head against the window and left a huge crack. He just laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5450) - you deserved it (43727)
On 01/13/2010 at 1:12pm - kids - by Joe (man) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)
Today, my daughter's school called to inform me that I needed to bring her some sneakers. Not feeling like driving the 15 minutes to her school, I told them I was away from town. Then I realized I was on my house phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3694) - you deserved it (55952)
On 12/10/2009 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6505) - you deserved it (90231)
On 10/13/2009 at 2:54am - love - by PanFace (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6505) - you deserved it (90231)
On 10/13/2009 at 2:54am - love - by PanFace (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6505) - you deserved it (90231)
On 10/13/2009 at 2:54am - love - by PanFace (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his family. They were drinking and having fun, so I joined in. I had one too many, got really goofy and then suggested the farting game. "Sorry, I can't hold my liquor!" I quickly explained. My boyfriend's mom shot me a cold look and said, "It's non-alcoholic." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8202) - you deserved it (78354)
On 08/18/2009 at 4:04am - misc - by probably_the_ex_now (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Monday 17 June 2013
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