About PsychoticAsylum : I'm not sure what to wrote here anymore. Guess I'll just say that I go on here daily yet I almost never comment. I might have a slight fear of making a fool of myself in public. Oh well. My profile picture isn't in support of Anonymous, I just really love the V for Vendetta comics and movie so I decided to draw the mask.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
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Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23545) - you deserved it (2015)
On 01/07/2012 at 7:33pm - health - by tictacnose - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26885) - you deserved it (6971)
On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7699) - you deserved it (26922)
On 12/29/2011 at 10:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - China
Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14332) - you deserved it (18829) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my girlfriend referred to her yeast infection as "making bread." I can never look at bread the same way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19742) - you deserved it (2066)
On 12/27/2011 at 10:15am - health - by themuffinman (man) - Japan
Today, a guy rang my doorbell, yelled "Happy Halloween" and then threw a bunch of leaves that he'd lit on fire at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22950) - you deserved it (1748)
On 12/25/2011 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, my apartment was broken into. The thief stole my TV, $350, and my Christmas tree. There is still a trail of broken ornaments from my living room to the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20605) - you deserved it (1481)
On 12/24/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by treeless - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I learned if you've slept with your soon to be step-brother you should tell your family. If you don't, he may blurt it out while drunk at a family barbecue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12310) - you deserved it (28062)
On 12/24/2011 at 1:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I grabbed some lotion to have a good old wank. However, I'd got it a bit wrong in my rush to spurt my man-mush into an old gym sock, and had picked up some concentrated bronzer. I now have neon-orange hands and genitals. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6874) - you deserved it (32691)
On 12/19/2011 at 9:29pm - intimacy - by Colton (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I walked into my bathroom to find my girlfriend applying my deodorant. This would have been fine, if she wasn't applying it to her mouth. I don't think deodorant helps with bad breath, but a quick Google search shows that it does help with herpes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33809) - you deserved it (2171)
On 12/13/2011 at 9:39pm - intimacy - by neednewdeoderant - United States (Michigan)
Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24166) - you deserved it (3277)
On 12/07/2011 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by journey_Jeanne - United States (California)
Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17365) - you deserved it (1816)
On 12/05/2011 at 8:21am - misc - by areyouserial - United States
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me while placing her order. I work as a Drive-Thru cashier at McDonalds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25711) - you deserved it (3493)
On 12/03/2011 at 8:29pm - love - by drummahboi99 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28752) - you deserved it (4076)
On 11/30/2011 at 12:39am - work - by immy504 - United States (Louisiana)
Today, at the Black Friday Sale, a fully grown man hit my 5 year old daughter for an Xbox. In anger, I punched the guy and gave him a bloody nose. I'm now banned from Best Buy, and my daughter has a concussion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39537) - you deserved it (4282)
On 11/25/2011 at 3:20am - misc - by nicoreal89 - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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