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PsychoticAsylum

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PsychoticAsylum
  • Town/Country : Oakland, CA, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1780
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About PsychoticAsylum : I'm not sure what to write here anymore. Guess I'll just say that I go on here daily yet I almost never comment. I might have a slight fear of making a fool of myself in public. Oh well. I love to draw, I drew my profile picture.

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PsychoticAsylum's favorite FMLs

Today, my prom dress finally arrived. My prom was yesterday. FML

#20544424
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43584) - you deserved it (9090)

On 03/15/2013 at 3:09am - misc - by ipaid350dollarsfornothing - Qatar

Today, my boyfriend got angry and threatened to dump me, all because I wouldn't give in to his demands not to go to a birthday sleepover with my friends. He seriously thinks it's going to turn into some kind of lesbian orgy and that I'll cheat on him. Thanks, PornHub. FML

#20543365
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41042) - you deserved it (5535)

On 03/14/2013 at 11:43am - intimacy - by wow (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my fiancée and I showed my mother-in-law a picture of the location at which we'll be holding our wedding reception. It's a beautiful waterfront building overlooking the ocean. She looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Looks like a good place to commit suicide." FML

#20543312
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28443) - you deserved it (2090)

On 03/14/2013 at 10:40am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Latvia

Today, being too poor to buy makeup, I walked into Macy's and "tested" some products out, just so I could look nice for my job interview. FML

#20541897
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30337) - you deserved it (3030)

On 03/13/2013 at 9:47am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was cleaning a house. While dusting a rickety nightstand, a drawer fell open and a light-up dildo fell out and turned on. I couldn't figure out how to turn it off. FML

#20541893
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29376) - you deserved it (2308)

On 03/13/2013 at 9:36am - intimacy - by OptimusVader (woman) - United States

Today, I was cleaning a house. While dusting a rickety nightstand, a drawer fell open and a light-up dildo fell out and turned on. I couldn't figure out how to turn it off. FML

#20541893
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29376) - you deserved it (2308)

On 03/13/2013 at 9:36am - intimacy - by OptimusVader (woman) - United States

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35335) - you deserved it (11296)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was helping my father-in-law out at a family barbecue. Somehow, the topic turned to grand-children, at which point I confessed that my wife has been having trouble conceiving. His response was to boom: "Sure you've been putting it in the right hole, son?!" FML

#20541069
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28476) - you deserved it (3146)

On 03/12/2013 at 6:43pm - kids - by um... maybe (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML

#20540752
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29093) - you deserved it (4553)

On 03/12/2013 at 12:43pm - misc - by ShadowBox (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, I invited my long-lost best friend over, because I haven't seen her much since she got a new boyfriend. 20 minutes into hanging out, he showed up at my door. He still hasn't left, and they're having sex on my couch right now. FML

#20540616
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43941) - you deserved it (5861)

On 03/12/2013 at 9:22am - intimacy - by kenleybunch - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my pet parrot learned a new trick. In addition to imitating my dog, and my voice when I call my mother, it can now imitate my sex noises, and likes to screech them whenever someone comes into the room. FML

#20540360
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20402) - you deserved it (6221)

On 03/12/2013 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, thinking my girlfriend had left her little black thong in the dryer to tease me, I sent her a picture of me seductively posing with it. She didn't text back, but a few hours later my 16 year old daughter asked if she'd left anything in the dryer. FML

#20539833
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16275) - you deserved it (40781)

On 03/11/2013 at 5:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

#20539287
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39617) - you deserved it (17096)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:33am - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went with my dad to Starbucks. There is this really cute guy who works there and he kept looking over at me, so I went over to say hi. He ended up asking if my dad was single. FML

#20538966
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35769) - you deserved it (3342)

On 03/11/2013 at 12:17am - love - by lonely girl - United States

Today, a man I once worked with passed away. He was a lovely, caring, and inspirational person whom I looked up to. My husband's form of consolation? "Old people die. Get over it." FML

#20538776
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25908) - you deserved it (2595)

On 03/10/2013 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



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Monday 17 June 2013

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