Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 11/14/2014 at 4:21am) | Search for a member
About PsychoticAsylum : I'm a pretty good person to talk to. I'm a gender neutral person, which means I do not go by she/he, him/her, or male/female. I would prefer to be addressed as they/them/their. I'm a fan of heavy metal and it's many sub-genres but I listen to other music too. I like playing Nintendo video games and reading manga/comic books. My favorite being Kabuki: Circle of Blood. I love to draw, I drew my profile picture.
Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, a customer spent ages bitching me out, because he refused to believe he needed to upgrade his computer, which still runs Windows 98, in order to install a modern game for his grandson. He ended up calling my manager and trying to get me fired for scamming him. FML
Today, my house was broken into. After we called the police, my dad started calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop. FML
Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML
Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML
Friday 26 June 2015