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Posthuman

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Posthuman

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2597
  • Number of comments : 300
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Posthuman : "I keep myself alive...just to die...more every day..."

I enjoy reading about other peoples misery. My favorite commenters are DocBastard, perdix, NoorFML, Nordrag, and gc327072.

This chick, her name is Captain_Becca_Ge, she's got it goin on.

I love music. Some of my favorite musical artists are NIN, Marilyn Manson, Iron Maiden, Black Sabbath, Slipknot, koRn, Stone Sour, Asking Alexandria, Suicide Silence, Dethklok, Bring Me The Horizon, Crown The Empire, Motionless in White, and As I Lay Dying, just to name a small few.

Yolotards and Swag Fags, start running. I will hunt you down, one by one until the cleansing is complete

"If you're gonna be an ass, sit down and shut up. An ass's best place is in a chair."
~Me

I am not a satanist. I am, in fact, a devout Christian who respects all faiths and religions.

If you want to, message me; I'll check it eventually. I would love to make a new

Facebook: John Zachary Knox

Posthuman's page activity

Visits<b>xxbvbsusanxx</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 7:51am<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 3:23pm<b>Crusher74</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 9:51am<b>Paksenarrion</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 9:59pm<b>FamousPeace</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 10:51pm<b>IndicaPaincakes</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 2:24pm<b>LadyStaple</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:35am<b>quangthuchien</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 4:55pm<b>cjlerch</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:29pm<b>meehartheturtle</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 9:44am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 3:38am<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 2:06am<b>kitcat517</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 8:17pm<b>PePziNL</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 4:17am<b>ArtemisGide</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 5:36pm<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 3:08am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 11:46pm<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 7:19am

Posthuman's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Posthuman's badges

Posthuman's favorite FMLs

Today, my family and I went to the movie theater. There weren't enough free seats near the front, so I sat a few rows back with my grandpa. He kept throwing our snacks at my parents' heads all through the movie. He claimed he'd been asleep the whole time, and I'm now grounded. FML

#20027054
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24346) - you deserved it (1929)

On 08/17/2012 at 8:39pm - misc - by wow, thanks (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I made a phone call in my office to my doctor. He wanted to call a prescription to my pharmacy, but wanted to know by what method I would prefer my medication. During our conversation, a group of potential clients walked in just as I exclaimed "I definitely prefer oral." FML

#19827814
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22834) - you deserved it (3174)

On 06/22/2012 at 3:28am - work - by me - United States (Indiana)

Today, I realized how poor I am when I had to use sharpies to color in the worn spots on my dress shoes before leaving for work. FML

#19265043
204 comments

Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML

#18968105
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34896) - you deserved it (3222)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:11am - work - by ABBenzin (man) - United States

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
175 comments

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30200) - you deserved it (3406)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States

Today, my mother tried to tell me that nicotine is the only substance that ensures weight loss, and that nicotine has been passed down in our family for over 5 generations of heavy smoking relatives. Then she encouraged me to start smoking. FML

#16776471
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40092) - you deserved it (3179)

On 06/21/2011 at 3:08am - health - by Caeru (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

#16657656
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13635) - you deserved it (47837)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found cigarette butts at the bottom of the toaster. My mother has been dropping them in there for I don't know how long. FML

#16613518
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30477) - you deserved it (2919)

On 06/11/2011 at 4:36pm - misc - by Macy (woman) - Italy (Lazio)

Today, I was at Wal-Mart where all the aisles had been moved. An elderly woman asked me where the pet products were, so I told her that I didn't know, but showed her where they could be. An hour later, she came back with security. She'd told them I'd purposefully gotten her lost. They threw me out. FML

#13718235
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26763) - you deserved it (2858)

On 11/04/2010 at 8:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my four-year-old asked me when I was going to die. I replied "Not for a long time, why?" He looked at me and stated "Because I only want to live with Daddy." FML

#13284441
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40184) - you deserved it (4259)

On 10/02/2010 at 1:07am - kids - by notsoonenufdeparted - United States (California)

Today, I had to sneeze really bad in a restaurant. To avoid sneezing on everybody's food, I turned my head to the side and sneezed, it just so happens a waitress was there serving a table. My nose went straight into her ass. FML

#13274666
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26849) - you deserved it (5366)

On 10/01/2010 at 9:06am - health - by Embarrassed - United States

Today, I wanted to remove my mustache hair with hot wax. The hair is still there, but my skin is all burnt dark brown. Tomorrow is my first day at school. FML

#7378045
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21692) - you deserved it (10655)

On 01/16/2010 at 1:16pm - misc - by queenofdeath - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, my dad finally used the electric shaver I bought him for Christmas. My dog now has bald patches. FML

#6987202
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20875) - you deserved it (2997)

On 12/28/2009 at 2:30am - animals - by dumbdad (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at the mall in a store looking at movie posters. I turned around and suddenly saw a creepy guy smiling at me, holding his arms out wide. I screamed "holy shit!" really loudly, causing everyone to stop and stare at me funny. Then I realized the creepy man was a cardboard cutout. FML

#4981586
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12016) - you deserved it (40496)

On 09/01/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by becca1417 (woman) - United States (Missouri)



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