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About Posthuman : "I keep myself alive...just to die...more every day..."
I enjoy reading about other peoples misery. My favorite commenters are DocBastard, perdix, NoorFML, Nordrag, and gc327072.
This chick, her name is Captain_Becca_Ge, she's got it goin on.
I love music. Some of my favorite musical artists are NIN, Marilyn Manson, Iron Maiden, Black Sabbath, Slipknot, koRn, Stone Sour, Asking Alexandria, Suicide Silence, Dethklok, Bring Me The Horizon, Crown The Empire, Motionless in White, and As I Lay Dying, just to name a small few.
Yolotards and Swag Fags, start running. I will hunt you down, one by one until the cleansing is complete
"If you're gonna be an ass, sit down and shut up. An ass's best place is in a chair."
I am not a satanist. I am, in fact, a devout Christian who respects all faiths and religions.
If you want to, message me; I'll check it eventually. I would love to make a new
Facebook: John Zachary Knox
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, my college class was talking about Felix Baumgartner, who jumped from the edge of space down to earth. A boy suddenly put his head up and said in a serious tone, "I thought he jumped from the moon?" Several girls concurred. This is my generation. FML
Today, for the second day in a row, I was constantly abused, yelled at, insulted, and berated by my wife for "endangering our child's life." I took her to the doctor for a vaccination and flu shot yesterday. FML
Today, while mowing the lawn, I was attacked by an underground hornet nest. I now have many stings, two scared dogs, and a mower still running outside. The hornets are swarming it and some are sitting on the lever, as if to turn it off. It's like they know. FML
Today, after much reluctance due to fear of causing a huge debate, I finally posted something on Facebook about the presidential debates. However, the post sparked an argument with my mom's childhood best friend, that ended with her telling me that my dad isn't actually my dad. FML
Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML
Today, my husband decided that he simply couldn't exist any longer without giving me his own version of a wet-willy. He creeped up on me as I was sleeping and wiggled his wet penis around in my ear. FML
Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML
Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML
Today, my boyfriend had a tantrum because I didn't like Black Sabbath as much as him. Apparently our entire relationship was based on him thinking I did. I've now been labeled "The Queen of Lies." FML
Friday 26 September 2014