Posthuman

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Offline (the 12/29/2015 at 5:17pm)

Posthuman

16Fucked!

PosthumanPosthuman
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 May 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4376
  • Number of comments : 315
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Posthuman : I see you've wondered onto this page. Well, I suppose it must have been an accident. No one really comes here, and when they do, it's to usually tell me that I'm a satanist. Which I'm not. I'm actually a Christian. Now, just because I believe in God doesn't mean I'm a buzzkill. I'm pansexual; greatly enjoy Heavy Metal, Sludge Metal, Metalcore, and classic rock; enjoy this website; and tend to be rather to the point and blunt when I'm not being witty.

You can find me on Facebook under John Zachary Knox, on Instagram as SinematicCreatures95, and on snapchat as Captain Courageous. I also have a reddit, not much is ever posted there, and it's helpmeiamonfire. My YouTube has some nice vids. Like my screamo covers that progressively get better. It's captaincourageous95.

You're still here? Huh. Didn't think there would be much more you'd wanna know. PM me if I'm wrong.

Posthuman's page activity

Visits<b>Zatalmas</b> - 12 hours ago<b>shabadabba</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 12:55pm<b>jill97</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 10:59am<b>sun_shine417</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 11:30am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 3:25pm<b>Cyntha</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 10:17am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 10:18pm<b>hfudge</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 10:50am<b>That_Girl_Talie</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 3:29pm<b>feven</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 5:24pm<b>Tomato_Cheese</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 4:10am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 3:31am<b>eski2015</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 11:25pm<b>starlandmarie</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 8:27pm<b>aiw14</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 4:07am<b>Doberman101</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 6:33pm<b>12shadic12</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 1:22am<b>ShawnC06</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 2:17pm

Fucked!<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 4:19am<b>That_Girl_Talie</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 9:29pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 6:48am<b>imhisgummybear</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 5:03am<b>TheyKilledKemmy</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 6:22am<b>wantmeasandwich</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 7:33pm<b>MrsHaxxo</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 6:27pm<b>AnthriX95</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 1:38am<b>heathertail</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 1:32am<b>ebonyirony</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 6:27am<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 8:29am<b>EKDH</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 7:33am<b>phantomofmind</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 3:32am<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 12:35am<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 11:45pm<b>aimzskee</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 3:29am

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Posthuman's favorite FMLs

Today, I was bitched out by my supervisor because of my lack of "customer service" skills. I work at a jail and all my "customers" are criminals. FML

by jailofc / 11/07/2012 at 12:48am / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

by Squid / 11/07/2012 at 12:11am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she and my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," and are most likely getting a divorce. FML

by rastamerican / 11/06/2012 at 8:29pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML

by new name / 11/06/2012 at 5:03pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, my girlfriend decided to invite her best friend over for a threesome. This would've been the best day ever, had I not been at work while it was taking place. FML

by sadness1992 / 11/06/2012 at 1:07pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my friends and I held an intervention for my fiancé. He's been talking and behaving like an "old-timey cowboy" non-stop for the last three months. Our wedding is in a month and he refuses to marry me if I can't accept his "life choices." FML

by cowgirl / 11/06/2012 at 12:42am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I woke up and looked over to see the "beautiful girl" I slept with last night. Turns out it was the obsessive girl from my class with a man-face I had avoided all semester. In conclusion, beer goggles are very real and very powerful. FML

by coolguy / 11/06/2012 at 12:15am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up with a wax strip on my chest and my girlfriend sitting next to me on the bed laughing. She pulled the strip. I screamed. FML

by Ugggggggggg / 11/06/2012 at 12:11am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a man lying face down in a field and thinking he was injured, I ran over to help. As soon as I got to him, I realized he was completely naked. He stood up and chased after me. FML

by bill / 10/24/2012 at 7:14am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the bar I've always gone to after work for the past 12 years. On arrival, I got banned for life, punched in the nose and thrown out. The barmaid comes out and says, "Sorry, wrong guy." FML

by Anonymous / 10/24/2012 at 6:51am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, a cashier asked me if I would like to donate to breast cancer research. Since I have already made my donations this month, I politely declined. The cashier snorted and said, "Maybe you'll feel differently if someone you love got cancer." I'm a two-year survivor. FML

by Anonymous / 10/24/2012 at 5:21am / United States / Money

Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML

by SFra / 10/23/2012 at 9:19pm / United States / Love

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML

by Andrew / 10/23/2012 at 3:12pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my cat played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2012 at 1:59am / United States / Animals

Today, my mom was feeling down, so I decided to buy her a gift. Knowing she likes lighthouses, I bought her a tiny one that plugs in and lights up. I brought it home, plugged it in, and when she saw me with it, she said, "Wipe that smirk off your face and get that junk out of here." FML